


Wildfire

by clexaismyotp



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Arthur Aron Experiment, College, Death, F/F, Necklaces, New York City, Sexual Content, Soulmates, You might cry I'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-06-08 18:24:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 32,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6868390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clexaismyotp/pseuds/clexaismyotp
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the first time in her 21 years of life, the oddly shaped necklace that hung around her neck was warm. Clarke's soulmate was somewhere in this busy coffee shop, and she was going to make it her mission to find them. </p><p>Or</p><p>The tumblr post where people are given necklaces at birth that are half of a unique shape and your soulmate wore the other half and they got warmer the closer together you were and colder the further away you were.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is named after the song Wildfire by Seafret

The repetitive shrieking that came from her alarm clock woke Clarke up with a jump. At the realization that she was awake, she groaned, slamming her hand on the machine's snooze button. Every morning she mentally questioned her decision to sign up for morning classes. She rolled onto her back, her eyes shutting against the light that came through the blinds. Maybe she could just skip class; drop out of school and become an exotic dancer.

A loud knock came from her door, "What do you want?" She groaned, not opening her eyes.

"You're going to be late for class." A voice responded, entering the room.

Clarke opened her eyes and lifted her head to look at the woman who was yanking the blankets off of her bed. "I didn't give you permission to come in, Octavia."

The brunette rolled her eyes, "I'm your roommate and your best friend, therefore I can do whatever the hell I want. Now get up before you're late for class."

"I'm not going." Clarke protested, crossing her arms and pouting her lips like a five year-old. 

"We've been over this, Clarke. If you skip class you're going to end up becoming a stripper. Or worse, you'll be living with me and Lincoln forever."

"Maybe if I become a stripper, I can finally find my soulmate." Clarke mumbled, rolling out of bed to put on pants.

Octavia rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, shaking her head at the blonde. "I'm pretty sure your soulmate is a lot classier than a sleezy guy who goes to strip clubs."

"You never know, they could be a sleezy girl." 

"Ha. Right." The brunette rolled her eyes at her roommate once again. She went into her closet, picked out a clean shirt and threw it at Clarke's face. "Now get ready, you're going to be late."

"It's only 8:30! Class doesn't start for another hour!"

"Yeah, well I want coffee!" Octavia yelled back as she walked out of her room and into the living room. 

The blonde stared down at the shirt her best friend picked out a rolled her eyes. It was one of Clarke's art shirts that pictured an elephant with the phrase "That's irrelephant" written underneath. She walked to her closet and exchanged it for a blue and white plaid flannel. She quickly buttoned it up and brushed her teeth. She didn't have enough time to shower, so she drowned herself in a bottle of perfume, put her hair up in a messy bun and walked into the living room, dragging Octavia off the couch to go get coffee. 

The café was a lot busier than usual. There was no place to sit and the line went out the door. "So much for getting coffee." Clarke grumbled. 

"We have half an hour and the school is right across the street, we'll be fine." Octavia tried to stay optimistic. "Besides, we're college students, we need coffee to survive. Especially with morning classes."

The line was moving surprisingly fast, and within fifteen minutes, the two got their coffee. Her and Octavia were just about to head out the door when the blonde froze in her tracks. For the first time in her 21 years of life, the oddly shaped necklace that hung around her neck was warm. Clarke's soulmate was somewhere in this busy coffee shop.

Time stood still as her eyes searched the shop, watching everyone's expressions to see if they changed just like hers. Her free hand held onto the necklace, taking in its warmth. She was in so much shock that she didn't hear Octavia yelling her name. Finally, after being shaken around a few times, she snapped back into reality. 

"Is everything okay?" Her best friend asked, worry washing over her face. 

Clarke looked down at the jewel that hung on her neck and shook her head. "It's warm, O. It's warm."

"Oh my god!" Octavia's eyes widened with realization. "How warm is it? Is it like room-temperature-warm or hot-coffee-warm?"

"It's like fresh-toast-from-the-oven-warm." Clarke replied.

"Great, so they're near by! They must be in this coffee shop!"

Octavia started searching the shop, looking for someone who was standing as awkwardly still as Clarke. Someone who was showing signs that their necklace was giving off the same effect. Clarke stopped her, however, "O, it's cold again." 

"Come on, they couldn't have gone far." She started dragging the blonde outside of the shop and down the sidewalk. 

"We're going to be late for class!" Clarke protested.

"You're the one who didn't want to go."

"Yeah, but I don't want to search all of New York looking for this person." She frowned. That was exactly what she wanted to do. She needed to find this person, this was her soulmate. But, she didn't want Octavia to miss class just because she may have felt her necklace warm up. Her best friend already found her soulmate, she didn't need to help Clarke search for hers.

"Fine. But, they must of felt it too. We're coming back here tomorrow-same time." Octavia demanded. Clarke just nodded her head, knowing that the brunette wouldn't take no for an answer. 

 

-

 

She sat at her desk, the yellow incandescent light illuminating the open text book in front of her. It was still dark outside, being only 6:30 in the morning. Lexa's head began to pound, the loud snoring coming from her roommate made it hard to study. As if philosophy wasn't difficult enough. She rubbed at her eyes and yawned, silently cursing the sleeping girl.

Another hour went by and the room was spinning. Last minute studying for a morning test was not a good idea. 7:30, it was time to wake her friend up. She sighed and rose from her seat, rubbing her temples. She needed coffee and she was going to make Anya pay for it. 

She poked the sleeping girl, causing her to stir a bit but not wake up. She then shook her a little bit. Nothing. Another sigh escaped her lips as she left for the bathroom, returning with a squirt bottle. Two squirts and the woman was up in a flash. 

"What the fuck, Lexa?! I'm not a fucking cat." Anya whined, wiping the water off her face. 

"Are you sure? Because you sleep like one." Lexa put down the bottle and crossed her arms, glaring at her roommate.

Anya rolled her eyes and got out of bed, retreating to the bathroom to brush her teeth. "I'm a heavy sleeper, sue me." 

"You're the law student, not me." Lexa sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing her eyes.

Anya just shrugged her shoulders and turned on the shower, disappearing into the hot steam that filled the small room. Lexa went back over to her desk and attempted to study the content once again. She cursed herself for choosing the elective. She was majoring in  _history,_ she didn't need this. But, her counsellor recommended it, and it seemed like a good idea at the time. After all, Lexa has yet to find her soulmate and the rigorous course kept her distracted from the cold silver that rested atop of her breast. 

8:30 and Anya poked the back of the brunette's head, hard. "Let's go. I wanna try this new coffee place down the street."

"What's wrong with the one downstairs?" She asked, rubbing the back of her head. 

"This place is cheaper and I heard their bagels are to die for. Come on, we have time!" Anya pleaded.

"Fine, but you're paying. It's the least you can do to make up for your sleeping habits."

"Like I said, it's not my fault I'm a heavy sleeper."

The two were met with the crisp, cold winter air of New York City. Lexa's light coat was not enough to prevent the goosebumps from poking out on her arms. The cold necklace was not helping the situation either. Two blocks. It took ten minutes to get to the café and Lexa complained the whole way. The moment they got to the crowded shop, Lexa froze in her tracks. The jewel around her neck was warm, heating the brunette in the bitter cold. 

"Anya..." Lexa whispered, her eyes wide with shock. 

Anya just turned her head and looked at her puzzingly. "What? You look like you've just seen a ghost."

The brunette had trouble forming words. She struggled to speak, but her voice was gone. Her mouth failed to produce any noise. Instead, she looked down at the silver around her neck and pointed to it with her hand. Anya understood the silent message. She quickly looked at their surroundings, looking for anyone who may be holding their necklace. Who may be in just as much shock as Lexa was. She tried to push her way through the line and into the shop, but no one would let her in. These damn New Yorkers and their need for coffee. She looked back at Lexa, getting ready to speak and tell her that they will find out who it is soon enough, but the brunette was already pacing in the opposite direction. 

"Lexa! Where are you going?!" The woman yelled after her roommate, running down the sidewalk. 

"I can't." Lexa shook her head. "I'm not ready."

"This might be your only chance, Lexa. If your necklace heated up, then so has theirs. Your soulmate knows that you were here and is probably looking for you. We have to go back."

She just shook her head once again. "Not today. We'll come back tomorrow at the same time. I just can't today. I'm not ready, I don't even know what I would say..."

"Lexa-" Anya tried to reason with her once again but the brunette stopped her. 

"Tomorrow." Lexa gave a short, stern answer and walked away from her roommate, heading towards the school down the street. She doesn't know why she was so afraid to meet her soulmate. After 23 years, her necklace was warm. Her soulmate was just inside the coffee shop. They were so close. But, something about a relationship and finding 'the one' was too much for her. A part of her was afraid that fate would be wrong. That they weren't really soulmates. A complete stranger whom she didn't know anything about was the one for her. She didn't even know if they were male or female (although she hopes they are a woman). It was the fear of the unknown. The fear that whomever this person was might not be who she expected. 

 

-

 

For the first time in months, Clarke didn't need to be woken up by Octavia. She was up by 7 am on an early Tuesday morning. If her assumptions were correct, her soulmate will be at the coffee shop at the same time today. They will be meeting for the first time, so Clarke made sure to look her best. She curled her hair, did her makeup, and wore a simple, but beautiful, blue dress.

Her roommate let out a low whistle when she walked into the living room. "It's like you're trying to kill your soulmate." She joked. 

The blonde let out a nervous laugh and shrugged her shoulders, "I just want to look good for them, that's all. We're going to remember this moment forever, it has to be special."

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with? I can skip class, it's no big deal..."

"No, O. I want to do this on my own. I don't want anyone interfering. No offense."

"None taken. Knock 'em dead, tiger. Can't wait for the double dates." Octavia told Clarke, tossing her her cellphone as she walked out the door. 

Her palms were sweaty and the hairs on the back of her neck stood up. It was cold out, but not as cold as the previous day. She does wish that she chose warmer attire, however. The coffee shop wasn't busy this time, so she sat at a table near the door. Every time the bell rung from someone entering the shop, she would look up, excitement and fear in her eyes. But, every time, her necklace would be cold. 

She started to feel it heat up after about fifteen minutes of sitting alone. She almost gave up and was about to leave the shop, but the warmth stopped her. Her eyes were now glued to the door, the heat rising every passing second. The bell rung and a brunette walked into the café, her eyes mimicking Clarke's. 

They were less than ten feet away from one another. Their necklaces burning their chests. The girl looked around and she froze when her eyes met the blonde's. Clarke's breathing hitched. Her heart stopped and mouth suddenly dry. She couldn't move. The woman standing before her was absolutely breath taking. Her jawline, the brown curls that rested on her shoulders, the sea-green eyes that were locked onto her. 

The brunette took a step forward, her elegant hands touching the necklace. She looked at Clarke's chest and then down at her own. The two seemed like a perfect fit. The unique shapes appeared to be able to fit like glue. Her missing puzzle piece was standing right before her and she was unable to speak. 

Swallowing her pride and fear, Clarke broke the silence. "Hi," was all she could muster up to say. The brunette just nodded and took a seat across from the blonde. "My name's Clarke. Clarke Griffin." She continued, hoping to encourage the brunette to speak to her. 

"Alexandria." She croaked. Her throat was so dry, she needed water. About fifty gallons. The girl in front her was leaving her speechless. "Alexandria Woods." She managed to break through the wall of nerves. This was her soulmate; why was she so nervous?

It was awkward. So, so awkward. The two didn't know what to say to one another. Clarke heard from Octavia that conversation came so easy when she and Lincoln first met. They were soulmates, so nothing could be awkward. But yet, here they were, unable to speak to each other. Clarke shifted in her seat uncomfortably, and now avoided making eye contact with Lexa. 

"I guess we're soulmates." She said, looking down at her necklace, still refusing to make eye contact.

"Yes, it appears so." Lexa replied. This was not what she was expecting at all. She was nervous yesterday, and she had every right to be. This was a train wreck. This is not what meeting the love of your life is supposed to be like. The girl was gorgeous, yes, but she was so awkward. If they didn't have necklaces to give it away, then Lexa would have never thought twice about this girl being the one for her. 

"I know that this is awkward, and I'm not usually like this, I swear." Clarke blurted out. "I'm just so nervous, and I know you are too. I just don't know where to begin. Here, take my phone number and let's meet up tonight. We'll think this over, digest everything that's happened, and then we'll talk. We're each other's soulmates, I mean the universe is never wrong. We're meant for each other and I want to know you." She scribbled down her number on a napkin really fast and slid it across the table to Lexa. 

"Okay." Was all the brunette could respond with. She gave the blonde a small smile and looked down at the number in front her as she left the café. This was not how it was supposed to happen. 


	2. Chapter 2

She should feel bad, but she doesn't. Anya is clutching her stomach, tears falling down her face as she lays on the couch laughing hysterically. Lexa just stands there and looks at her, unable to process what just happened. One minute she was telling her best friend about her awkward encounter, and the next, she is on the couch laughing at her. 

"It isn't funny." Lexa states, offended by the reaction. 

Anya takes a minute to reply, unable to form a sentence in her current state of laughter. "Yes it is. That made my day, holy shit." 

Lexa sighed and took a seat on the edge of the couch, burying her face into the palms of her hands. She just shook her head and fought back the tears that were threatening to escape. "You don't understand." She mumbled. "This was supposed to be special. This was supposed to be an amazing moment we could tell our children about, and I ruined it."

Her roommate sat up quickly, now serious, and put her arm around her. "Hey, it couldn't have been  _that_ bad. What was she like?"

"She was just so awkward. But I mean so was I. She was beautiful, though. She had the bluest eyes I've ever seen. Like, wow. She was breathtaking. She isn't what I expected my soulmate to be like though..."

"You expected someone like Costia?" Anya answered the silent question. Lexa messed around with this girl her first year at college. She knew that she wasn't her soulmate, but she needed someone to pass the time with. Someone to keep her bed warm until she did find her soulmate. The problem is, Costia found her soulmate a lot sooner than Lexa, leaving her alone. 

Lexa shook her head, she didn't want to admit it, but Anya was right. Costia was everything Lexa wanted in a soulmate. She was perfect and they hit it off the moment they met. Her and Clarke? They just didn't click. Or, not at this moment. 

"You have to call her." Anya told her, bringing her out of her thoughts. "The universe is telling you that you are made for each other. The necklaces are never wrong... That five minute interaction means nothing, Lexa."

The brunette pulled out the crumpled napkin from her back pocket and examined the scribbled numbers. She stared at the name written above the numbers for a long moment before pulling out her phone. "You're right." She told her roommate as she dialed the number. "I have to give it a chance, I don't have a choice." She sighed, bringing the phone up to her ear, listening to it ring. 

"Hi, this is Clarke! I'm probably covered in paint right now, so I can't come to the phone. Leave a message and I'll call you back!" The voicemail sang. 

"Hi Clarke, this is, um, Alexandria from earlier. I want to try this again. Are you free for dinner this evening? Call me back." Lexa left a short message and hung up the phone. 

Anya raised an eyebrow at her in question. "I think she's an artist." Lexa said, giving Anya something to talk about. 

"That's... Interesting..." Anya responded, hesitantly. She tried not to roll her eyes. If she was an artist then she probably didn't have a lot going for her. But, she wasn't going to tell Lexa that. 

"I don't know, though. I guess I'll find out tonight." Lexa rose from the couch and headed to their room. 

"You don't even know if you're going to meet tonight, she didn't answer the phone." Anya informed her. 

"Yeah, well she's my soulmate, so she'll most likely want to see me." Just then, her phone started to vibrate. It was Clarke. "That was fast." She mumbled to herself, answering the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, Alexandria! I'd love to see you tonight! Where were you thinking about meeting?" Clarke said, chirpier than she was this morning. 

Lexa was taken back a bit by surprise. This did not sound like the same girl she met this morning. Her sentences were more clear, her voice holding more confidence. It wasn't the same awkward, nervous girl. "There's this restaurant by the university, The Ark, have you heard of it?" 

"Yeah, I live right by it!" Clarke responded, chuckling. 

They must go to the same school if she lived by it, Lexa thought. "Awesome! Is eight okay?"

"Eight is perfect. I'll see you then." The blonde replied, and the line went silent. 

Lexa stared down at her phone and smiled. Her nerves and doubts were now replaced with excitement. Maybe she takes back what she thought about the blonde, the universe could be right after all. 

"You have a date." Anya broke through the silence and gave her a wide, goofy grin. 

"I have a date." Lexa repeated and smiled. Eight o'clock. Five more hours. 

 

-

 

"So let me get this straight. You woke up early to get all dolled up because you wanted to make this meeting 'perfect," Octavia made air quotations with her fingers, "but yet you were awkward as fuck and you're now thinking that the universe is wrong?"

Clarke nodded, "Well not 'wrong,' it just didn't feel exactly how I pictured it would. I thought I would see her and just fall in love instantly and jump up and kiss her."

"It's not like the movies, Clarke." Octavia rolled her eyes, slightly amused. 

"No shit. I don't know, I just expected it to be  _different_." She sighed. "I mean, she is gorgeous. The world stopped when I saw her. I've never seen someone more beautiful."

"What about me?" Octavia gasped, pretending to be hurt by the statement. 

Clarke laughed, "You're beautiful too, O, despite being a pain in my ass. But Alexandria... Just wow." She looked off into the distance, remembering the brunette's appearance. Octavia gave Clarke a wide, goofy grin. "What?"

She shrugged her shoulders, "She's definitely your soulmate."

"I don't even know anything about her." She defended. "Yeah, the necklaces say so, but-"

"But, you're in love with her. You may not exactly know it yet, but I can tell. You're acting how I did when I met Lincoln. You two are soulmates, for sure."

Before Clarke could respond, she heard her phone ringing in the other room. She got up from the couch and dug through her purse in search for the device. She didn't get to the call in time, but saw that the caller left a voice message. 

"Hey Clarke, this is, um, Alexandria from earlier. I want to try this again. Are you free for dinner this evening? Call me back."

"Oh my god!" She screamed, staring down at her phone in surprise. 

"What?! What happened?!" Octavia asked, running into Clarke's room.

"She called! She wants to have dinner tonight!"

"Why are you talking to me about this? Call her back!"

"Oh shit, yeah." Clarke clicked on the unsaved number and called the girl back. She talked with Lexa about tonight, and hung up the phone. 

"So?" Octavia asked, listening to Clarke's side of the conversation the entire call. 

"I have a date tonight at The Ark." She informed her, nonchalant.

"You don't sound excited about it..."

"Oh, you know, it's whatever." She shrugged her shoulders and walked to her closet in search of an outfit. 

Octavia groaned, "Are you seriously trying to act cool in front of me right now? I've known you since the 10th grade, Clarke."

"Maybe I'm a little excited..."

"Okay, so I'm going to spend the night at Lincoln's because I don't want to be in this loft when you have sex with the love of your life, tonight."

Clarke's mouth hung open, offended and surprised with her roommate. "We're not going to have sex!"

"Yeah, sure, okay." Octavia replied, walking out of the blonde's room. 

"We're not!" Clarke called, a blush creeping onto her cheeks. Maybe Octavia was right, this girl is definitely her soulmate, and she was starting to understand the feeling in the pit of her stomach. 

 

-

 

7:55. She stood outside of The Ark, phone clutched in her hand. She was early, but she's always early to everything. Her palms were starting to sweat. How was it that she was so nervous but so excited at the same time? She looked around and she froze when her eyes locked onto a familiar blonde. Clarke was walking towards the restaurant looking absolutely stunning. This is not how Lexa remembered meeting her for the first time. Everything was a lot more clear this time. The silver around her neck warmed up and it was a feeling that she doesn't think she'll ever get sick of. 

"Hey!" Clarke greeted, a lot more confident than before. She had nothing to fear. This was her soulmate, she might as well get comfortable with her now. 

"Hi! Wow, you look amazing, Clarke." Lexa complimented, eyeing her up and down. 

"Thank you! So do you, Alexandria."

The brunette was confused about being addressed by her full name, but she realized that she never did tell Clarke to call her by her nickname. "Call me Lexa."

Clarke smiled, "Lexa. I like it." 

They stared at each other for a while, taking the other in. Their necklaces burned and it was a feeling they were getting so comfortable with. A warmth they never wanted to dissipate. "Shall we go inside?" Lexa finally said, offering her arm to Clarke.

"I would love to." She responded, looping her arm with the brunette's. Her skin tingled at the touch, the hairs on the back of her neck standing up. This was their first physical contact and it just felt so right. 

Lexa led Clarke into the restaurant and informed the host about their reservation. He quickly had them seated in a booth, a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket awaiting them. 

"Fancy." Clarke said, eyeing the bottle. She was impressed and she could tell it wasn't a cheap bottle. 

"I have to impress my soulmate, don't I?" Lexa smiled, taking a seat opposite of the blonde. 

"I'm the one who has to impress you. You impressed me the moment we met. You're absolutely breathtaking, Lexa." 

A blush crept onto her cheeks, her heart threatening to break free from her chest. She felt like a little school girl. She's received plenty of compliments about her beauty, but hearing them from Clarke was different. They had more meaning. "I could say the same about yourself." 

"What, me? Nah." Clarke waved her hand in dismay. "I bet you expected someone a lot better, not just some dumb art student."

Lexa's eyes shot up, a bit upset with the blonde's comment. She quickly reached across the table and grabbed her hand, "You're not dumb, Clarke. The universe is a lot wiser than to pair me with some ditzy blonde."

Clarke laughed at the joke, glad that the brunette had a sense of humor. It lightened the mood, and she felt herself becoming a bit more comfortable every minute. "So, tell me about yourself. Are you a student? Have a job? Roommate?"

The brunette leaned back into the booth and sipped at her champagne, "I'm currently working on my master's degree in US History."

"Why history?" Clarke asked, leaning on the table. She was genuinely interested in everything Lexa had to say. 

"I love history. It's just so interesting to know about all the people who came before us. Who made America what it is today. We wouldn't be here without them."

"What do you plan on doing when you graduate?"

"Become a teacher. Probably high school. I love kids - despite them being hormonal teenagers with an attitude - they're still pretty great."

Clarke's eyes lit up at the mention of children. "Do you want kids?"

Lexa's lip curled up into a small smile. She leaned on the table, her face inches from Clarke's. "Of course I do. I want a big family."

"So do I." Clarke whispered, quickly taking a glance down at the girl's lips. They were so beautiful, and the freckle that rested on her top lip caught her interest. A minor human imperfection that was perfect. The blonde was tempted to just kiss her now. Before they've had their food. Before they've gotten to know more about each other. She could feel the connection. It was all starting to make sense. The universe wasn't wrong. She wanted to kiss her - she needed to kiss her. But, before she could, Lexa pulled back. She let out a soft sigh, disappointed but relieved. It was too soon. 

"What about you, Clarke? Are you a student?" Lexa snapped her out of her thoughts. 

Hearing her name roll off of her tongue so nicely sent chills up Clarke's spine. She never wanted Lexa to stop saying it. "Like I said, I'm an artist." She shrugged her shoulders. "My parent's wanted me to take a different route and follow in their footsteps, but I'm happy with art. Yeah, it might not get me far, but I love it and I'm happy."

"What did your parents want you to do?" Lexa asked. It started to feel like she was prying into Clarke's personal life. But, then again, they're soulmates. They might as well learn everything about each other now; there was nothing they should hide from one another. 

"Either be a cardiothoracic surgeon like my mom, or an electrical engineer like my dad." She sighed. "They're both famous in their fields, just research Abigail or Jake Griffin."

Lexa almost spat out her champagne, her eyes widening at the information. Clarke was rich. She didn't want to bring up this information, however. It would all be revealed soon enough, anyways. Instead, she changed the subject. "You said you live around here, do you have any roommates?"

Clarke laughed to herself at the thought of her roommate. "Yeah, I'm living in a loft with my best friend from high school, Octavia." She took a deep breath and shook her head, "She's something else." She chuckled. "She found her soulmate about a year ago, but refuses to move out. She wants to stick with me until college is over. Honestly, I think she just felt bad that I didn't find mine yet. She'll probably be out of my house by the time I get home." 

Lexa laughed with the blonde about her roommate. "Yeah, I have a roommate like that; Anya. We were friends in high school and we're still together. She doesn't have a soulmate though. Her necklace was given to her as a whole. She's cool with it, it just gives her more time to focus on school and stuff, I guess."

The blonde shook her head in disbelief, "No soulmate? Living your whole life alone... That's insane."

"Imagine going your whole life never finding them, though. That's even worse. That's what I thought was going to happen to me, to be honest. I would've never thought that my soulmate would be going to the same university as me." She thought out loud. Her heart starting to race; this was getting too real, too fast. They've said it plenty of times throughout their conversation, but it still felt weird. Soulmate. They were soulmates and they were completely aware of this. It was weird, and awkward.

Clarke spoke, as if reading Lexa's mind. "It's funny... You meet this stranger, but you know that you two are destined to be with one another. You know that you are going to fall in love and have a family and live the rest of your lives together. But, it's insane! I don't know you, but I know that I am going to love you. But, when is the right time to say that I love you? I don't feel it. Well, I don't know if I do. How am I supposed to know what love feels like if I've never experienced it before? It feels too forced..." She started to spill out her thoughts, regretting opening her mouth. She's said too much. 

Lexa sighed as her thoughts went to Costia. She fell for her despite knowing that they weren't meant for one another. A part of her wished that she would never find her soulmate. That their soulmates were across the ocean, living a life in a foreign country they would never visit. That the universe played some cruel joke on them with their necklaces. She wanted to be with her, despite what fate commanded. But, she couldn't. Costia found her soulmate and Lexa soon found hers. But, Clarke wasn't Costia. She couldn't say she was better or worse - she doesn't know her. The blonde was right, though, this was all too forced. 

"Give me your necklace." Lexa commanded, snapping out of her own thoughts. 

Clarke looked down at the silver around her neck and was baffled, "I'm sorry, what? Why?"

"Trust me on this." Lexa didn't really know her purpose for doing this, she just wanted to forget about Costia. She needed to realize that the other girl was gone and her soulmate was a few inches in front of her. The necklaces were the key to this reality. They were a symbol that Lexa will eventually fall in love with the artist. So, for some reason, she wanted to see the necklace.

Clarke didn't argue any further and unclipped the chain and gave the necklace to Lexa. The brunette took off her own and connected the two unique shapes. They fit together like glue. Lexa held up the finished product for Clarke to see. It was a star. 

"A star? How did I not notice that?" Clarke asked herself in disbelief. It was such a simple shape, but yet the halves were so weirdly constructed. "Do you think it means something?" 

"What was your friend Octavia's whole shape?" Lexa asked, ignoring the blonde's question.

"I don't know. I don't think they ever connected their necklaces, she still wears it around her neck." Clarke answered. "Maybe it doesn't mean anything significant. Just that we're both soulmates. The shape probably doesn't matter."

Lexa squinted her eyes at the joint necklaces in disappointment. It has to mean something. She needs it to mean something much more. Why a star? "Maybe it doesn't." She sighed and moved her hands to unhook the two. 

"Wait." Clarke stopped her. "Don't unhook them. Keep them together."

"You don't want to wear it?" Lexa was confused. Why keep them together? They wouldn't be able to wear them anymore, and the brunette did enjoy the warmth that emerged from it when she was near Clarke. 

Clarke took the necklaces out of her soulmate's hand and smiled, "Why would I want to wear it if I already know who my soulmate is?" She put the newly made star down and grabbed Lexa's hands, staring into her eyes in silence before their server came with their food. Seeing the pieces come together made her even more sure about the brunette being the one for her. 


	3. Chapter 3

Conflicted and Confused. She didn't know what she was feeling. She and Clarke have a connection, but there is something in the pit of her stomach telling her no. Stopping her from falling for this girl. Contradicting the universe that tells her they are soulmates. They are meant to be together. Grow old and have children. But for some reason, Lexa isn't allowing herself to feel for the blonde the way she should feel. 

Clarke cares for her. She can tell. Throughout their dinner and the walk back to her loft, Lexa can see that Clarke takes the soulmate thing very seriously. She can see that the blonde has already began to fall for her and may be falling in love a lot faster than she is. 

She had the chance to go inside. An invite for coffee inside the warm loft was very appealing. But, the voice in the back of her head told her no. So she declined the offer and walked back to her own apartment, hanging her head with shame and guilt. 

"I don't understand. You two seem perfect for each other." Anya sat down next to Lexa with a cup of tea, discussing the night the two soulmates shared together. 

Lexa took the cup graciously and shook her head in response to her best friend's statement. "We are. There is a connection, I can feel it. It's a connection I didn't have with Costia so I know that fate isn't wrong."

Anya sighed, slightly annoyed, "So what is the problem?"

"I'm scared. This is way too fast and after what happened before-"

"Costia wasn't your soulmate though! Clarke is! Clarke is here. She has your necklace. _She is your soulmate_. No one else is."

"But-" Lexa tried to give another excuse, but Anya stopped her from completing her thought once again. 

"You want to know what the problem is Lexa? You're scared of your own feelings. You're scared of opening up and believing that someone could actually love you and be with you forever. You're scared of appearing weak, because to you, love is weakness. Well here's the thing, your soulmate is waiting for you and she probably loves you. She is the one for you for a reason. Love isn't weakness if you're meant to spend forever with this person. It's time to escape that negative mindset and go be with your soulmate. Go be with Clarke."

Lexa sighed and got up from her seat on the couch and retreated into her room. She didn't say another word to her roommate and left to be alone with her thoughts. She didn't know what to do. A part of her knows that Clarke is the one for her. But, another part is terrified to fall in love. Anya is right. She doesn't want to admit it, but she's right. Lexa hates to feel weak, and falling for Clarke will make her appear as such. There was only one thing she could do. 

 

-

 

Three days since their first date and nothing. Not a single text or phone call from the brunette. She sat on the edge of her bed, staring at the joint necklaces, tears slowly falling down her face. What happened? Things seemed fine on their night out. She could've sworn that they had a connection. Clarke felt what love appears to be like in movies and books. A racing heartbeat, goosebumps, chills down her spine, a jolt of electricity being sent through her every nerve when they touch. 

But yet, here she was, staring at a phone with zero messages and two necklaces that was supposed to signify their love. She tried texting and calling Lexa of course, but received nothing in return. Not even a single read receipt. Lexa wasn't even opening Clarke's text messages. 

She was devastated. 

A loud knock on the loft's front door brought her out of her thoughts. Was it Lexa? Maybe she came to apologize for ignoring her calls. Her heart beat sped up. She quickly wiped the tears off of her face and ran over to the door. She put on a smile and slowly opened it. Her smile quickly faded, however. 

"Hey sweetie." Her mom frowned, pushing her way past Clarke and into the loft. She embraced her daughter with a warm hug. 

Clarke sighed into her shoulder, "Did Octavia call you?"

Abby pulled back and gave the blonde a small smile, "She's worried about you, and so is your father and I." The two walked over to the couch and her mother continued. "You know, your father was like this too when we first met."

"What do you mean?"

She let out a small laugh, "The day we met, your father nearly ran for the hills. He was so nervous. We had our first date, and it was obvious that we were soulmates. But, I didn't hear from him for almost two weeks after that! I was devastated, just like I should be."

"But what happened?"

"He called me and told me that it was all just too much at the time. He needed to take a while to process it all. He needed to come to terms with the fact that I, his soulmate, existed. Things were smooth sailing after that. Daily meet ups, nights out together, and eventually we got married and had you."

Clarke sniffled her tears away and gave her mom a small smile, "So, you're saying there's hope?"

"She's your soulmate, Clarke. I don't know who this 'Lexa' girl is, but there must be a reason that she's avoiding you. Not that it's a good reason, but she is probably doing what your dad did and is just coming to terms with it. You two are still very young. It's scary! Soulmates are a scary, scary thing. But, everything happens for a reason, and the universe is never wrong."

She hugged her mom again and let out a wet laugh, "Thank you, mom." She pulled back quickly with a sudden thought and looked down, confused. "What do I do now, though?"

Abby put her hand on her daughter's leg to comfort her, "All you can do is wait." 

 

-

 

One week later. The door to the apartment opened and Anya's head shot up from the book she was buried in. The sight of Lexa made her sigh with relief. She jumped up from the couch and ran over to the brunette, embracing her in a bear hug. "Where have you been?! I thought you died!"

"I told you I had to go for an escape. Don't worry I was safe." Lexa pulled back from the hug and put her bag down by the door. 

Anya's eyes went wide, "'An escape?' You were gone for a week, Alexandria."

The brunette flinched at her full name, "Please don't call me that. You sound like my mother, and the last thing I need is to be scolded by her."

"Where did you go?" Anya crossed her arms, ignoring Lexa's statement. 

"I went to Aunt Indra's. I'm surprised she didn't call you." 

Anya's hands immediately went down to her phone and clicked on her recent missed calls. She cursed herself and looked up at Lexa dumbfounded, "Turns out she tried, but I didn't see it. My bad."

Lexa laughed and rolled her eyes at her best friend, "Nice."

"So what happened at Indra's?" 

"She basically just comforted me; didn't tell me I was wrong for what I'm doing. She just made everything clearer for me. We talked about Costia and why I can't fall in love. So, yeah."

"What are you going to do now?"

"I can't go see Clarke. Not yet. I'm sure she's tried to call or text but I turned off my phone and I haven't checked it yet." She crouched by her bag and dug through its contents until she found her cellphone. She held onto the lock button, waiting for the small apple to appear on the screen. After what felt like forever, her phone finally turned on. She unlocked it and all the messages came flooding in. "Oh dear." She whispered. 

"What?" Anya asked, curious of what was on the phone. She crouched beside the brunette, the phone being handed to her. 17 missed calls. 6 voice messages. 14 text messages. "Oh dear." Her roommate repeated. 

Lexa clicked on the 6 unheard voice messages and allowed them to play:

1\. "Hey Lexa, it's Clarke! I had fun last night, can't wait to meet up with you again!"

2\. "It's me again, it's just been a few days and I want to make sure everything is okay. I haven't heard from you. Call me back."

3\. "Did I do something wrong? Talk to me, Lexa. Please call me."

4\. "I understand you probably need time to process all of this, but please call me."

5\. "It's been five days... I'm really worried. Please pick up."

6\. "Lexa, I'm really worried now. It's been a week and I haven't heard anything. You haven't even opened my texts. Please call me back, I just want to know that you're okay."

The brunette sighed and locked her phone. Her chest stung hearing those messages. The worry in the blonde's voice made her eyes water. She needed an escape, but she didn't think that her silence would hurt Clarke this much. She guesses that she doesn't really know much about the blonde after all. They've only been on one date (two if she counts the coffee shop incident). She wanted to call her back, it was the least she could do, but she wasn't ready. It wasn't the right time. 

"Are you going to call her back?" Anya asked, bringing Lexa out of her thoughts. 

She shook her head, "No. I have to do something else first. It wouldn't be right if I called her before this."

Her roommate looked at her as if she was going crazy, "Okay... What exactly do you have to do first?"

"I have to see Costia." Lexa told her. She picked up her bag and retreated into her room, her best friend following her. 

"What?!" Anya yelled, frustrated and confused. "You can't see Costia! What good is that going to do? Isn't she married now?"

"I am aware. I just need closure." 

"Closure for what? She's found her soulmate. She has a family. This is something you could have too if you just go see Clarke right now instead of doing this crazy thing where you talk to your ex." Anya was getting angry with her roommate. This was insane. She can't just go see the girl who made her believe love is weakness. Lexa opened her mouth to speak but was cut off. "No, I don't want to hear your excuses. You haven't seen her in what? Five years? Imagine how awkward this situation is going to be, Lexa."

"You're not stopping me, Anya. I know what I'm doing." Lexa defended. 

"What are you even going to say to her?"

"Trust me. I know what I'm doing." Was all Lexa could counter with. In all honesty though, she had no idea what she was going to say. She didn't know what she was doing. She believes that going to see Costia will give her closure, but on the other hand, it might make things worse. All she could do was roll the dice and see what happens. 

She got in the shower, cleaned herself up and left the apartment. She could hear Anya screaming at her even as she walked down the hallway towards the complex's exit. Her best friend was just looking out for her, she couldn't get mad. It was annoying, however. She should've just stayed at Indra's. She shouldn't have told her about Costia. Oh well, it was too late now. She was already walking towards the subway to take the A Train to her ex's home. 

A one hour train ride sitting in between a pregnant lady and a man who couldn't stop chewing his finger nails was not ideal. The fact that they didn't get off at any of the previous stops made Lexa go crazy. She was stuck with them the entire ride. As if she wasn't annoyed and nervous enough. Right when the train's doors opened for her stop, she nearly leaped out of her seat. She felt the need to shower again, feeling disgusting. She hated taking the train, but she couldn't walk to Costia's house. Not anymore. 

She walked down a few blocks, allowing Siri to guide her through the streets of Manhattan. She stared down at the address she was being taken to and hoped that it hasn't changed. However, a part of her wishes that Costia doesn't live there anymore. Then she could turn around and go home. Her nerves have started to get the best of her. She didn't want to do this anymore. The voice on the phone told her that she has arrived at her destination. It was too late. She was already standing outside of the house. 

A black Suburu was parked in the driveway, telling Lexa two things. One, someone was home and two, children lived here. She stood outside of the door for a long moment, unsure if she should ring the bell or knock. But really, it wasn't the way she wanted to signal her presence that was making her take so long, it was her second guessing. "Do it for Clarke." She whispered to herself and took a deep breath, deciding to ring the doorbell. 

The chime went off and she waited a few moments before she heard the lock click. The door slowly opened and there she was, a face she thought she would never see again. A beautiful brunette with dark blue eyes stared at her. At first, the woman looked at her with curiosity, as if she were a stranger. But, it only took a split second for her to realize who was standing at her door. "Lexa?" She whispered, as if she were staring at an apparition. 

"Hello, Costia." She held her head down, almost embarrassed for showing up. She should've listened to Anya. She shouldn't have come. 

"How long has it been?" She asked, unable to tear her eyes away from the woman she knew before her soulmate. 

"Almost five years." Lexa answered, fiddling with her thumbs. "I'm sorry to show up uninvited, it's just that something happened and I didn't know what else to do."

Costia peaked her head outside of the door and looked around the front porch to see if anyone else was around. After clearly seeing that Lexa was alone she opened the door wider, "Please, come in."

Lexa nodded her head and took a step inside the woman's home. It was strange. This was probably the most uncomfortable she has ever felt. The air was so thick between the two. If she thought that her meeting with Clarke was awkward, then she was wrong. This was the absolutely most awkward situation she has ever been in. 

"Would you like something to drink?" Costia asked, leading Lexa into the kitchen. 

"Water, thank you." Lexa took a seat on one of the bar stools. She took in the decorations around her. This all felt too strange. She shouldn't have come. 

Costia put the glass down in front of Lexa and leaned over the kitchen island. "So, what happened?" She asked. She didn't want to catch up or reminisce about the past. She had a family now, but she still cared for the brunette. She was in love with her before her soulmate came along. She was always going to be there for her, no matter how much time has passed. 

"I met my soulmate." Lexa spit out, causing Costia's eyes to widen. "Her name is Clarke. She's great, but I can't get myself to fall in love with her. I want to. I want to so badly, but something won't let me. I don't know why, but I figured that coming to see you might help me."

The woman put a hand on the brunette's arm and smiled, "When I first met Reagan, I had trouble falling in love with her. I was in love with you at the time, despite our promises not to fall for one another. I didn't want her to be my soulmate. I was actually upset when I met her because then it meant I couldn't be with you. But, look at me now. I have two beautiful little boys and a house in the city. I'm in love with my family. The universe is never wrong."

"But what did you do to allow yourself to fall in love with her? To get over me to be with Reagan?" 

"I gave it a shot. That's all I could do. All I could do was try it out and hope that time would allow me to fall for her. I had to get you out of my head, forget everything about you. I had to accept what fate chose for me."

"I tried that, though, but I still can't fall for her." 

"How many dates have you been on?" 

Lexa rubbed the back of her neck and answered shyly, "One..."

Costia laughed, "There's your problem! Have you spoken to her since?" The brunette looked down at her glass and shook her head no. Costia sighed, "Look, you can't run away from this. True love isn't something you can run from. You know what, I have an idea. Have you heard of Arthur Aron?"

"Isn't he a psychologist or something?"

"Yeah, well in 1997 he conducted an experiment to see if strangers could fall in love. It was called The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness. The people chosen for the experiment lost their necklaces at a young age, or were just never given one. They were arranged into pairs and asked to work through 36 questions and then stare into each other's eyes for four minutes." Costia explained. 

"Well, what happened?" Lexa asked, intrigued. 

"It worked! Within months some of the pairs were married."

Lexa tilted her head at her in confusion, "Why are you telling me this?"

Costia smiled, "Because you should try this with your soulmate. Look up the experiment, go on another date, and ask her those 36 questions. Then stare into her eyes, and if you don't fall in love with her then for the first time, I guess the universe is wrong." 

The brunette sighed. This isn't what she expected out of her visit, but it was something. Costia did help and this tip she was given wasn't a bad one. Crazy? Yeah, it seemed to be, but then again, necklaces define who one's soulmate is. She got up from the stool and walked around the island to give her ex a hug. "Thank you, Cos. This helped."

"I'm glad it did, Lex. You deserve all the happiness in the world." She rubbed her back and then pulled away. "Remember, love isn't weakness. If anything, love makes you stronger."

 

-

 

There was a small knock on the door. It was so light and so soft that Clarke almost thought she imagined it. She started shifting her position on the couch, preparing to get up to answer it, but Abby stopped her. Her mother answered the door instead. 

Her mother looked the guest outside up and down, not knowing who it was. She has never seen this person before. "Can I help you?" She asked, assuming that they were probably a salesman or just some lost college student. 

The stranger looked past Abby and into the loft in search of someone, but had no luck spotting them. "I'm looking for Clarke. Is she home?"

Clarke appeared in the doorway quickly after hearing her name. Her eyes began to water slightly and her jaw dropped. It has been over a week. "Lexa?" She asked in astonishment, unsure if who she was seeing was real. She wanted to hug her. Wanted to kiss her, even. But, she was unsure what to do. So she stood there awkwardly in the doorway staring at the breathtaking brunette while her mom watched the two in wonderment.

"I guess I'll leave you two alone." Abby smiled and pushed past them to leave the loft. 

Clarke opened the door wider and motioned for the girl to come inside. This was the first time Lexa was inside the loft and it was quite a nice set up. It was big, a lot bigger than her apartment. She saw doors that led to several different rooms, and she wondered what each one contained. 

She turned to Clarke and could barely muster up the words she wanted to say. The words she needed to say. She was quiet for a moment, unable to speak. Unable to produce sound from her lips. After what felt like forever, she choked out the words, "I'm so sorry."

This time Clarke didn't need to think twice. She wasn't unsure anymore. She took in the brunette in a warm embrace. Their first hug. They fit together like glue. She never wanted to let go of the other girl. She felt like home. She felt like love. She was everything Clarke needed, and the blonde didn't know she could miss something she never had, but God, she missed this.

"Don't be sorry. I understand. I'm just glad you're okay." She spoke into the crook of Lexa's neck.

Lexa pulled back and immediately missed the contact. She grabbed Clarke's hand, never wanting to let her go. "No, I have a lot of explaining to do. And I will explain why I needed to escape, but not right now. I would rather talk about it over dinner at my place tonight."

Clarke gave her a big smile and a small laugh, "Your place? I would love that." 

Love. That word made both of their hearts stop. It was such a simple word and it was used in such a different context. But yet, it was an unspoken feeling that neither were sure they felt. Lexa's plan for tonight was to make sure that feeling would no longer be a question. Tonight would be the night the two fall in love with one another, as the universe commanded. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is told about Arthur Aron's experiment is true! (Minus the necklace part of it, of course) It is a very interesting experiment and was recreated in 2015 in Seafret's music video for Wildfire. The results of that recreation were never revealed, sadly. 
> 
> Thank you for reading so far! I hope you are all enjoying it. Quick question: I am contemplating adding a bit of smut to the fic later on, does that sound alright to all of you? Let me know in the comments! Also, don't forget to leave kudos if you like it so far!


	4. Chapter 4

Being forced out of the apartment, Anya went to her father's home for the night. She didn't protest against leaving, happy that Lexa was giving the whole soulmate thing a second try. The brunette didn't tell her much about her meeting with Costia other than "it helped me put things into perspective." She didn't know exactly what that meant, but if it meant she was happy then she didn't care. 

A beautiful meal was put into place. It was simple, nothing too fancy, just pasta. She stole the recipe from her mom, it was a family secret. How lucky was Anya that she had a roommate that knew how to cook? Actually, not too lucky, because Lexa hardly every cooked, only on special occasions would she touch the stove. This was a special occasion, indeed.

She did all her research on the 36 questions Arthur Aron had his pairs ask one another and wrote them down on notecards. She was going to have to explain the experiment to Clarke before starting, obviously to avoid any confusion. The cards were split evenly into two piles of 18 and placed to the side for later. They were going to have dinner first and then sit down with wine to ask each other the questions. 

The pasta was just being placed down on the small dining table when the doorbell rung. Lexa quickly took off her apron and tossed it into the pantry and ironed out her dress before opening the door. The sight of the blonde standing outside almost made her faint. She was absolutely beautiful. She became more beautiful each time Lexa saw her. Maybe it was because she was finally allowing herself to fall in love with her. Or maybe Clarke was just too beautiful to handle all at once. In all reality though, it was definitely both. 

"Clarke, you look absolutely stunning." Lexa mumbled, unable to articulate her sentence clearly. 

The blonde tucked a stray hair behind her ear and blushed at the compliment, "Thank you, Lexa, but you're the stunning one here."

Lexa laughed, not wanting to go into a cheesy argument about who was more stunning. She stepped to the side of the doorway and allowed Clarke to walk into the small apartment. Her eyes wandered, taking in the cozy home. Her nose caught the scent of the pasta and her mouth immediately began to water, "Mmm, pasta. My favorite."

The older girl let out a sigh of relief. She was worried that the blonde might have a thing against Italian food or was just weird and hated noodles. The universe would be crazy if they gave her a soulmate that hated pasta. It was Lexa's favorite dish; her mom used to make it for her all the time growing up. "Mine too. It's ready, let's go eat."

Candles illuminated the table, giving it a more romantic feel. The two dug into their meals and barely conversed with one another, both preoccupied with how delicious the dish was. "That was amazing." Clarke stated after finishing her meal. "Good thing you know how to cook, because I can barely make a cup of noodles." She joked, but she was dead serious. "When I was younger, I almost set the kitchen on fire trying to make mac and cheese. Ever since then, my mom has refused to let me touch a stove."

The brunette laughed, a real, genuine laugh. Clarke's heart fluttered, loving the sound that she caused to erupt from her soulmate. She was so beautiful and had the most adoring laugh. She couldn't help but stare at her in admiration, her heart swelling more at the confused look being given to her. 

Lexa knew that look. It was the same look that Costia used to give her when they first began to fall in love. Sadness flickered in her eyes, a gut wrenching feeling taking over her body. She pushed it out of her mind quickly, refusing to allow herself to think about it. Thinking about the other woman will not help her. Focus on the present. Focus on the beautiful blonde sitting just inches away. "Have you heard of Dr. Arthur Aron?"

Clarke nodded her head, "Yeah, he conducted that experiment on the people who lost their necklaces, right?" Of course she knew. All she and Octavia cared about was finding their soulmates, so it was only knowledgable to research about it. The experiment was one of the first things Clarke learned about when she became fascinated with the thought of being meant for someone. It was an interesting experiment and the results were absolutely beautiful. But, why was Lexa asking her about the psychologist who helped conduct it?

"Yeah, I wanna recreate it if that's alright with you." Lexa informed her, slightly relieved and nervous about the blonde's response to conducting the experiment between the two of them. Will this make her look bad? That Lexa is doubting the universe and wants the experiment to make her fall in love with her? It was true, but she didn't want Clarke to know that. 

The blonde stared at her for a moment, trying to read the emotions in Lexa's eyes. She wasn't stupid, there had to be a reason why the brunette wanted to conduct the experiment. It's not like they were lost souls who didn't have any direction on whom to love. They knew they were meant for one another, the universe made that clear. Why would Lexa want to test that?

On the other hand, maybe she was just being paranoid. Maybe Lexa was just a psychology buff and wanted to do the experiment for fun. Her eyes didn't give away anything, she guarded herself pretty heavily. Clarke couldn't read her at all.

She shrugged her shoulders, "Sure, it'll be fun." There couldn't be much harm in doing it, even if Lexa was having doubts. The blonde figured this would be a good way for the both of them to get to know each other better. This will bring them closer together, just as the world intended. 

The two moved to the couch, keeping a small space between them. Lexa retrieved the cards she put to the side and handed a pile to Clarke. "I researched the questions that were used during the actual experiment. Do you want to go first, or should I?"

"I'll go first." Clarke said and removed the card from the top of the deck and read it out loud, "If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?"

Lexa flinched slightly and prayed that it went unnoticed. Of course the first question was going to be something so personal. Why couldn't Aron make up a question about a favorite color? She took in a deep breath and sat up straight. "I just wish my parents would've been more lenient with what I did. I know that too much freedom is a bad thing, but it would've been nice if I was allowed to decide for myself once in my childhood. They always decided what extracurricular activities and classes I should take. I probably wouldn't be as stuck up if they would've just let me live for myself." She ended it with a joke and light laugh. 

Clarke never took her eyes off of her the entire time. Sadness filed onto her expression. She sympathized with the brunette. "Trust me, I know how you feel. When I told my parents I wanted to become an artist they were furious. They told me I was wasting the family name. That I wouldn't amount to anything. They're cool with it now, but I think it's 'cause they have to be."

"Was that your mom at your loft, today?" The brunette asked, remembering the older woman who answered the door. She and Clarke shared many similar features, so it would only makes sense that that was her mother. 

"Yup, the famous Abigail Griffin." Clarke waved her hands in the air and rolled her eyes, her voice coated with sarcasm. Her tone quickly changed, more lighthearted, "No, she's great though. I'm lucky to have her as a mom. I'm closer with my dad, but he's always across the country so when it comes to a 'crisis,' my mom is usually the one to show up."

"Crisis?" Lexa tensed. Was she the crisis that Clarke was referring to? She had to be. They found out they were each other's soulmates and the brunette went running for the hills. Of course Clarke would be freaking out. 

The blonde froze, realizing what the brunette heard. She didn't mean to tell about a crisis situation, it just slipped out. It was too late to try and change the subject, green eyes were locked onto her. It felt as if Clarke were to move, the brunette would pounce and attack. Maybe she could lie and say that Octavia was sick or something. No, that wouldn't make much sense. "Not necessarily a 'crisis.' Octavia called her and told her that I met my soulmate and she wanted to come down to hear all about it and maybe even meet you." She decided to tell the truth. Well,  _a truth._ She didn't tell her about the panic and fear she was going through and that's why her mom came. She couldn't tell her that. It would make Lexa feel like shit. Instead, she tiptoed around it. 

"Oh. I see." Lexa nodded, accepting Clarke's answer. She knew it was a cover up, she could read it in the blonde's eyes. Clarke didn't hide her emotions, she wore her heart on her sleeve. This was something that Lexa picked up very quickly when they first met. Something she envied about the blonde and also sympathized. She wishes that she could show her emotions. That everything wasn't hidden away by a thick wall. But, it must make someone feel weak to have their feelings so easily read. Not being capable of telling a white lie without someone being able to catch it. 

She didn't point it out though. Didn't want to dwell on the subject anymore, so she changed it by asking the next question. "When did you last sing to yourself?"

Clarke laughed, both relieved and amused by the question. "Wow, this guy really did come up with the perfect questions. Last time was probably in the shower." She joked. 

"What about to someone else?" Lexa asked the follow up question that was on the card. 

"Last night. The café where we met has open mic every Friday night." Clarke informed her and began to prepare herself for the next question she knew the brunette would ask. 

"So you're a singer?" Lexa asked. Yup, that was the question Clarke was anticipating. 

She shrugged her shoulders and took a sip of her wine, "Yeah, I guess you could say that. I'm not that good, it's just nice to perform every once in awhile. It's just for fun." 

Lexa raised an eyebrow at her, "I guess I might have to come by open mic one night. Just see how 'not that good' you are." She flirted. 

Clarke laughed, "If you show up, I'm going to have to drag you on stage with me." 

"Fine, if you want everyone to go deaf and throw their coffee at us." She joked.

The two laughed and started to break down their walls and relax. Clarke may have even shifted a bit towards Lexa, closing the space between them. She wasn't too close, but there was only about a few inches between them now. She picked out the next card and laughed at the question. Well, it was more of a statement. "Share with your partner an embarrassing moment of your life."

"Does that mean I share or you share?" Lexa asked. 

"I have no idea, but I guess I'll share, because I have a good one." Clarke chuckled. "I was seventeen and my family was vacationing at our cabin on the lake. I met this guy there and we got drunk when everyone went to sleep. I was so drunk that I thought that my necklace was heating up and I tried to kiss him! I don't know why I thought he was my soulmate, considering we knew each other for a few hours before that and my necklace was cold as always. Anyways, he ended up moving his head-freaked out-and I fell into the lake. Splash! The lights to the cabin came on so fast and my dad ran out with a baseball bat and scared the poor kid away."

Lexa was laughing at the blonde's story. She placed a hand on the girl's shoulder, "Oh my God! What happened next?"

Clarke stopped laughing at the touch and smiled at the brunette. "I was grounded."

Lexa laughed again but became silent after seeing the way Clarke was looking at her. Her hand was still resting on her shoulder, refusing to pull it away. The contact was simple, but felt right. The blonde scooted closer to the brunette, closing the remainder of space between them. Their knees were touching now. Clarke's blue eyes darted down to the brunette's lips, licking her own. Lexa inhaled a small, sharp, quiet breath. 

Her eyes darted back up, blue meeting green. Neither of them broke eye contact. They stared into one another's eyes, the thought of the final step of the experiment in the back of their minds. It was quiet. The sound of each other's heartbeats and breathing filling the silence that surrounded them. 

Clarke couldn't hold back anymore. Her eyes fluttered shut as she leaned in and kissed the brunette. This is what she was dying for. The feeling of her soft lips against her own. The taste of wine on her tongue. This was what Clarke wanted. Needed. She could do this for the rest of her life if it wasn't for the need to breathe. Her head was spinning and the world around them disappeared. It was just the two of them. Clarke felt like she was floating. Like she was on Cloud 9 and nothing else in the world could compare. Nothing ever will compare. 

She understood. Lexa now understood why people crave this. Why people fight for this. Why people die for this. The feeling that was forming in her stomach was inexplainable. A mixture of butterflies and backflips. Her heart felt as if it were going to break out of her chest. Her fingertips tingled as she touched the girl in front of her. Her hands finding the back of her neck, pulling her in closer. This was a feeling she has never felt before. A feeling that she never knew existed. One that she now couldn't live without. 

The kiss wasn't enough. The two needed more. Clarke's hands slid down from the brunette's face and down to her waist. Her hands played with the fabric of her short dress and moved underneath. Lexa gasped at the cold touch as her hands traveled up her back. 

Clarke broke away, gasping for air. Lexa frowned, missing the warmth of the other girl's lips. "Before we do anything, I want to make sure it's okay with you."

Lexa smiled at her. She was so cute asking for consent, and it only made the brunette want her more. She nodded her head and pulled Clarke in for another kiss. This time it was more rough. The two desperate to get closer. Clarke's fingers worked the bra's clasp and managed to unhook it in a matter of seconds. Lexa helped remove the garment and tossed it on the ground without breaking the kiss. 

She removed her hands from underneath Lexa's dress and placed them on her shoulders. Very easily, she started to push her down onto the couch. Clarke repositioned herself so she was straddling the brunette. She broke the kiss, her lungs gasping for air. She looked down at the brunette with hooded eyes and saw how dark her green eyes have become. Everything about her was oozing with desire. Clarke gave her a small smirk and moved to the girl's neck, sucking on her skin. 

Lexa let out a small moan at the feeling. Anya was going to make fun of her for days when seeing the marks Clarke was producing, but she didn't care. Clarke was telling the world that she was hers and it felt so good. 

Clarke's hands made their way underneath the dress once again, cupping the brunette's breasts in her hands. She squeezed them gently, producing another moan from the girl. That sound was music to her ears, and she needed to hear more. She stopped sucking on her neck and took her lips between hers. With two fingers, she rubbed the sensitive buds, instantly hardening them. Lexa moaned into her mouth, clearly pleased with the sensation. 

There was too many layers between them. Clarke needed to get closer. She needed to feel her lover's skin on hers. She sat up tugged on the dress, telling Lexa to take it off. "Let's go to the bedroom first." Lexa said, not wanting their first time to be on the couch. 

Clarke got off of Lexa and allowed her to guide them to the bedroom. The blonde didn't take much time taking in the room, too focused on the girl in front of her. Lexa turned around, smirked at her and slowly took off her dress. The fabric fell to the floor quickly, and Clarke couldn't hold herself back anymore. She pounced on her, pushing her onto the bed, hard. "You're so beautiful." She breathed into the kiss. She made her way down the brunette's body, placing kisses from her neck to her chest. "So, so, beautiful." She whispered, stopping at her breasts.

Her lips wrapped around her nipple, her tongue swirling against the hard bud. This earned her a hard gasp from the girl underneath her. The way her breathing intensified and how her body wiggled beneath her, Clarke knew how badly Lexa wanted her. She stopped sucking on her now-sensitive nipple, and took it in between her teeth, gently biting down. A loud moan erupted as Lexa arched her back and pulled on Clarke's hair. 

She pulled back, a cynical smile playing on her lips. She kissed down her stomach, tasting the salt and sweat on the girl's well-defined abs. She stopped at her hips and smirked at the wetness seeping through her lingerie. She groaned at the sight, dying to taste her, but she was a tease and had to work her up even more.

She slowly spread the older girl's legs apart and kissed her inner thighs. Her fingers lightly brushing against the fabric. Clarke kissed atop of the girl's thong, working her up even more.

"Clarke-" Lexa breathed. "Please. I need you."

Clarke hummed in satisfaction. The brunette begging for her caused her own lingerie to soak. She sat up and removed her dress, finally exposing herself to the older girl. Lexa gulped, her eyes going wide at the sight of the blonde. Clarke unhooked her bra and tossed it across the room, allowing her torso to be fully exposed.

"Fuck." Lexa's mouth went dry. Clarke was absolutely breathtaking. She sat up and pulled her back down on top of her, kissing her hard. "Please, touch me." She begged, whispering against her lips. 

That's all it took. Within seconds, Clarke was taking the thong off of Lexa's long legs. She kissed the girl's sex, tasting the savory wetness being produced. Clarke moaned at the taste. Lexa smiled with satisfaction, gasping at the feeling of the blonde's tongue. Clarke started to work circles around her sensitive bud, causing the brunette to moan loudly. 

Is this what heaven was like? Was Clarke a goddess? Because she could work magic with that tongue of hers. It took so much strength for Lexa not to unravel right then. Her strength wasn't going to last long, however. Clarke's fingers entered her quickly and unexpectedly, earning a loud moan, the brunette's fingernails being dug into her back. 

Clarke didn't care about the pain, though. She actually enjoyed it and wanted more. She thrusted her fingers quickly, pumping in and out of the brunette. Lexa's fingers scratching down her back. They were definitely going to leave a mark. 

It didn't take long for her to unravel. She arched her back and let out a loud cry as her body quaked beneath the blonde. Clarke didn't slow down, she continued to thrust in and out through the tremors. Lexa finally stilled and Clarke removed her soaked fingers and looked down at the older girl. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing very, very hard. 

"Kiss me." She whispered, still not opening her eyes. Clarke obeyed and kissed her, Lexa moaning at that taste of herself on her tongue. Pulling back for air, she opened her eyes and looked into her blue eyes, "Where have you been all my life?"

"I'm asking myself the same question." Clarke whispered and rolled off of the brunette to lay next to her. Lexa turned so her back was facing the blonde, allowing Clarke to take her into her arms and become the bigger spoon. 

"Give me a few minutes and I'll do you." Lexa promised. 

Clarke chuckled, "Don't worry about it, babe. You'll get me next time. You need to rest."

Lexa nodded, her heart doing backflips at the pet name. "One of the questions from the cards: Tell your partner something you like about them already. I can easily say it's that mouth of yours." She joked, referring back to the experiment.  

The blonde laughed and kissed the back of her neck. They may not have made it through all 36 questions, but Lexa knew that the universe wasn't wrong and there was nothing to worry about. Clarke was the one for her, she knew it the moment she saw her. It just took awhile for her to realize it. To move past her stubbornness and actually allow herself to fall in love. 

Love. Lexa was in love. Nothing felt more right than their current state. Falling asleep in each other's arms, completely vulnerable to one another. For the first time in her life, she felt safe. Lexa looked forward to waking up the next morning and finally being able to tell the blonde that she loved her. She just hoped that Clarke felt the same way. 


	5. Chapter 5

The door to the apartment unlocks and a loud voice sings, "I'm home! How was your date?" Anya allowed the door to freely fall, slamming shut behind her. 

Lexa stirred in her bed, groaning at the loud noise. She didn't wake up though. She continued to sleep in Clarke's arms, unaware that there was somebody in the apartment.

"Lexa? Are you still asleep? It's nearly noon-" Anya's mouth hung open, stopping mid-sentence when she opened her roommate's door. A blonde female was lying with Lexa under the covers, both clearly undressed. A smirk went across her face as she stared at the soulmates.

She started to leave the room when Lexa woke up, her eyes widening in embarrassment at the sight of her best friend. "Anya? What are you doing home?"

"It's Sunday and I live here." She informed her, leaning against the door frame, laughing. "Looks like you've had some night."

The brunette sighed and glared at the girl staring down at her with a wide grin, "Get the fuck out of here, you perv."

Anya held her hands up in surrender, "Alright, alright. I'm meeting up with a friend for lunch anyways. I just came home to change and see how you're night went. Now I know." She winked at the brunette. 

A pillow came flying at her head, but missed by a wide margin. Lexa couldn't really throw well with one arm while laying down. Anya received the message and left the room laughing, shutting the door behind her. 

Clarke managed to sleep through the entire mess. Lexa looked down at the sleeping girl and smiled, her heart racing a mile a minute. She was so beautiful and Lexa was so in love. She kissed her forehead, unable to resist the urge to show affection.

A smile crept across the blonde's face as she hummed in satisfaction to the feeling. She stirred a little, her eyes fluttering open. The first thing she saw were big green orbs staring down at her, making her stomach fill with butterflies. 

"Good morning." Lexa whispered, running her fingers through the blonde's hair.

"Mmm, good morning." Clarke hummed, shifting around in the bed again to get more comfortable.

Lexa leaned in to kiss her. It was long and sweet, both craving the other's touch. She finally pulled back, "How did you sleep?"

"That was probably the best sleep I've ever gotten in my 21 years of life." She responded with a large grin. It was true. Clarke never felt more safe and content than when she had Lexa in her arms. She was able to drift off and fall into a deep slumber without any fears or doubts running through her head. 

"What are your plans for today?"

Clarke frowned at the thought of her plans for the day. "I have a busy schedule. I have to finish this painting for class and I promised my mother dinner with her and Octavia before she leaves in the morning." 

"When will I be able to see you again?" Lexa asked, fear in her eyes. For some reason she was scared that Clarke was going to disappear despite them being meant for one another. She was scared that Clarke didn't entirely reciprocate her unsaid feelings for her and that she will run off. She doesn't know why she feels this doubt and she hates it. It's all just too good to be true. 

"You go to the University down the street, right?" Clarke said more like a statement than a question. She knew the answer, but still waited for Lexa's nod of affirmation. "One o'clock tomorrow, meet me at the food court by Panda Express?"

Lexa sighed with relief that she didn't have a class that afternoon. "Perfect."

"Great." Clarke grinned and rolled out of the bed, searching for her clothes that have been scattered on the floor.

Lexa propped herself up on one elbow, watching in admiration as she walked around the room naked. She eyed her elegant curves and the way she swayed her hips, knowing that the brunette was staring. Lexa managed to stop a groan escape her throat, holding back the want she had for the blonde. She wanted so badly to jump out of the bed and pin her to a wall, fulfilling her promise to take care of her. But, it was noon and Clarke had to go and Lexa wasn't going to disrupt that. 

Sex is great, but school is more important. It's a pity how that works.

In a matter of seconds she was fully dressed, looking the same as she did the night before, adding the wild sex hair. Lexa slightly frowned, she enjoyed seeing the blonde naked, her body was absolutely breathtaking. It made her feel like Clarke trusted her. She didn't really know the blonde, but for someone to allow themselves to be completely exposed and vulnerable to someone else has to mean something. 

Clarke sighed, it was time for her to leave and she couldn't dwell any longer. Octavia was waiting for her at home and there was so much that she had to tell her. So much about the night that she just shared with this amazing woman. She was sure that her roommate already knows about what happened at the lack of her presence at home that night. 

The brunette got out of bed and threw on a large t-shirt to cover herself quickly. Despite feeling blessed that Clarke is okay with walking around naked in front of her, Lexa isn't as comfortable, yet. She trusts Clarke, but something still doesn't settle right in her stomach. She loves her, she knows the universe isn't wrong, but there is that fear. There might always be that fear. She doesn't know what scares her more, the fear of Clarke leaving or the fear itself. 

She walks up to Clarke and takes her hands, giving her a small smile, "I'll see you tomorrow." Is all she says, and watches the blonde to leave the apartment. Her heart aches slightly, but there is nothing she can do. She will see her again soon, but for now, she needs to keep herself busy. 

All her course work is finished and she doesn't have any exams approaching any time soon, so she decides to clean the dishes from the previous night. She fixes up the living room and blushes when she finds her bra underneath the couch. After she finishes cleaning for what only takes about an hour, she plops down on the couch and finds a documentary to watch on Netflix. 

Once she starts the next documentary, a bag of chips in her lap, the front door unlocks and in comes her best friend. Anya comes in without a word and just eyes Lexa with a smug smile. She does a weird walk/skip thing to the couch and sits down, snatching the bag from Lexa's lap. She eats a few chips, still eyeing the brunette with a grin on her lips. Lexa just stares at her, slightly amused but mostly annoyed. She opens her mouth to speak after awhile, but is stopped when Anya jumps in instead. 

"So, that was  _the_ Clarke Griffin, huh? The legend. The hot blonde with blue eyes.  _The soulmate."_  

Lexa rolled her eyes at Anya's teasing but laughed with her friend. "Yeah, that's her. I wanted you two to meet a  _different way_ , but good timing is never on my side."

"Well  _technically_ , I didn't meet her. I just saw her naked in your bed." She shrugged, getting up from the couch to walk to the kitchen and retrieve a beer. She walks back in and takes a big gulp before speaking again. "So, what happened? Tell me everything - minus the details of the sex."

"We had dinner. Played twenty questions. Kissed. And I'll let you figure out the rest." Lexa said, disinterestedly. She was annoyed that Anya wanted to know everything. It was her relationship and she wanted to keep it private. But, at the same time, it was nice to have someone to talk to about it all. Even if she spared most of the details. 

She raised her eyebrow in confusion, "Twenty questions?"

Lexa laughed, "It's a long story." She never told Anya about the Arthur Aron experiment or how Costia recommended it, and quite frankly, she was too embarrassed to tell her about it, knowing that it will earn her a laugh in the face. 

"Okay..." Anya said, still confused. "How do you feel about her? Still doubting the universe?"

She shook her head, "No." Her voice was small and she spoke so low that Anya almost didn't hear her response. She was shy about it and saying it out loud will make it more real. It will make Clarke and her a reality. Something that isn't just about necklaces and fate anymore. Something that isn't just in books and fairy tells. Something that was real and was actually happening to her.

This was real. Clarke was real. Their relationship was becoming more real and so was her love for her. _She loved her_ , but she couldn't tell Anya that. Not yet. There was only one person she could tell first, and that person was blue eyes and a heartbeat. But the timing just isn't right yet. The timing is never right for Lexa. 

 

-

 

The loft is empty to Clarke's surprise. She heads to her room and turns on the shower, washing off the events from the night before. She can't help herself from thinking about the brunette and the way she felt against her skin. She shuts her eyes and her hands begin to wander over her skin. She gets lost in time and isn't fully aware of what she is doing until there is a loud slam outside of the bathroom. Her eyes open wide and she pulls back her hand from her sex in shock. She sighs and realizes two things; someone is home and she needs to have Lexa fulfill her promise as soon as possible. 

She finished washing up quickly and tries to ignore the tension between her thighs. She is not going to be in a good mood. Sexual frustration was something that Clarke didn't deal with well, which is why she resorted to sleeping with this guy just until she found her soulmate. She remembered her arrangement with the man, Finn, and made a mental note to call him soon and tell him about Lexa. He hasn't called in the past couple weeks, so maybe he already found his soulmate too and just forgot to tell Clarke. Either way, she still had to talk to him. 

Octavia barged into her room without knocking just as Clarke was pulling on the elephant shirt from her closet. She still wasn't wearing pants, however, but Octavia didn't care and neither did she. The two were so close and have known each other so long that seeing each other naked wasn't a big deal. 

"So, you didn't come home last night." Octavia leaned against the door frame, her arms crossed and an eyebrow raised. 

Clarke was pulling on a pair of paint splattered sweatpants as she rolled her eyes at her roommate, "Please tell me my mom isn't home." The last thing she needed was for her mom to overhear about the amazing sex she had last night. 

"No, Abby isn't here," Octavia laughed moving towards the bed, making herself comfortable for the story to be told, "She's meeting with an old friend for lunch and won't be home for like another hour."

Clarke sighed in relief and sat on the edge of the bed. She had to get this painting done and talking to Octavia about Lexa would take up way too much time because the brunette would want details. Every single detail leading up to them sleeping together. Also, her thighs were aching and reminiscing about Lexa will not help her sexual frustration one bit. In fact, it would just make the matter worse. "I think you know why I didn't come home last night."

"I don't assume things, Clarke. For all I know, she kidnapped you and you just managed to escape. I don't know who this girl is. Your soulmate could be a serial killer for all I know." She mocked, her voice thick with sarcasm.

Clarke told her about what happened last night. She told her about the dinner, the experimental questions, and how when she looked into Lexa's eyes she felt something in the pit of her stomach that she's never felt before. And indescribable feeling that only made sense when they kissed. She told her about how they slept together and how sex with Lexa wasn't like sex with anyone else. About how it wasn't just about fucking and that there was actually meaning behind it. How sex felt real for the first time in her life. 

Octavia listened and didn't care about the details about the sex. She shared the details with Clarke about her and Lincoln, so this was okay. A smile stayed on her face the entire time. She was so happy for her best friend. Clarke was genuinely happy. A kind of happy that she's never seen before. It was so comforting and she was glad that Clarke finally got to experience love for real. 

"You love her." She said, more like a declaration than a question. 

Clarke blushed and her stomach dropped. She does. Or at least she thinks she does. She doesn't know what love is, but if Lexa was it, then yeah, she was in love. "I might be." She nodded. 

"Does she know?"

She shook her head, "No. It isn't the right time." But then again, when is the right time? They've known each other for a couple of weeks now, despite one of those weeks being silent. 

"Lincoln didn't tell me he loved me until a few months after we met. He knew as soon as he met me, and so did I, but it still felt rushed, you know?" Octavia explained, "Like, you're in love from the beginning but you want to make sure that it's meant to be. That the universe is right and it was. Is is. But it's not like we meet and get married the next day. I mean, Linc and I don't even know what our joint symbol is. We never connected them."

The necklaces. Clarke gets up from the bed, interrupting Octavia who was starting to trail off of the subject and talk about her own relationship instead. She eyed Clarke, watching her go to the top drawer of her dresser. She pulled out a long sliver of silver and it took her a moment to recognize the jewelry. 

"Is that your's and...?" She pointed at the joint necklaces. 

"Yeah. We connected them on our first date. Or she did. But, I have no idea what it means. A star..." She trailed off, staring at the completed jewel the entire time. 

"A priest defines it." Octavia informs her. 

Clarke finally tore her eyes off the necklaces and stared at her best friend in question. "Wait, what?"

"Yeah, when you two get married, the priest or whoever ordains the wedding connects the two necklaces and defines the symbol."

How did Clarke not know this? She spent most of her time growing up researching soulmates and the necklaces, but she must've missed this. She doesn't understand how, and she kicks herself for not knowing. "What's so significant about the symbol that only a priest can define it?"

"It's your story. The symbol is usually connected to a phrase that the priest will recite, and it will carry so much meaning that only you two will fully understand. It will represent you. It usually relates to how the universe brought you together."

"I see." She responded, processing it all. It started to make sense now. Clarke constantly hears her parents reciting a phrase to each other. She made note to ask her mom about it at dinner. "Well O, as much as I love talking to you about soulmates and how I would love to mush over Lexa some more, I have a project due tomorrow that I have to finish."

"I thought it was finished?" Octavia questioned. She's seen Clarke work on this painting for weeks and it looked perfect. Something that would be hung in an art museum, so it doesn't make much sense why she's still working on it. 

"It still needs work. The colors need adjustment and it requires more detail."

"Alright, I'll never know how an artist's mind works. It's too complex." Octavia raised her hands in mock surrender and left the room, calling out, "You have five hours until dinner, Griffin!"

 

-

 

It was perfect. Or close enough. She will never see her paintings as perfect, having the ability to spot every minor flaw. The longer she stares at it, the worse it begins to look. She sighs and throws her towel on the floor of the room in defeat. She tries not to think too much about the painting, knowing that her professor will love it anyways and give her an A. She was his star student. 

She went into the shower, quickly washing off the sweat and paint from her skin. If only she had more time before dinner, but she had to be ready in an hour. The throbbing between her thighs never went away. The constant thought of Lexa causing her to ache. She needed release, but only Lexa could properly relieve it. Less than 24 hours. She just had to wait. 

After getting dressed and applying her makeup, she still had about ten minutes until they had to leave. She grabbed her phone, shut the door to her bedroom and dialed Finn's number. After a few rings he picked up. 

"Hey Princess, I was wondering when you'd call."

Clarke rolled her eyes, "Yeah, well, I'm calling about that. I met my soulmate, Finn."

The line was silent for a moment until a laugh broke through, "Well damn. Congrats then! He's a lucky guy."

"Girl. My soulmate is a she." Clarke corrected.

"Well shit! She's a lucky gal then. Make sure to invite me to the wedding, babe. Hopefully I'll find my someone by then so it won't be awkward or anything. I'm really happy for you."

She ignored the pet name he used. He's a good guy and means well, the pet name is nothing more than a habit. "Thanks, Finn. Your person is out there and she's going to be lucky to have you."

"Stay in touch, Princess." He said before the line clicked dead. 

Clarke sighed with relief. That was a lot easier than she thought. She was afraid that Finn may have fallen for her despite their agreement. By the sounds of it though, she dodged a bullet. He sounded more relieved if anything.

"Griffin!" Get your butt out here I'm hungry!" Octavia yelled, forcing Clarke out of her room. She continued to talk about her hunger the entire cab ride to the restaurant. 

Once seated, the three ordered their meals and relaxed, the conversation flowing smoothly. 

"Hey mom, can I ask you about what you and dad always say to each other? Your phrase or whatever?" Clarke asked, referencing the information Octavia gave to her earlier. 

"To see the world is to see you." Abby quoted, smiling to herself, "What about it, dear?"

"What was your symbol?"

"It looks almost like a circle. The shape of the world, I guess. We met in an airport, both happened to be traveling to Venezuela."

Clarke nodded in understanding, "I was just wondering because of Lexa and me." Her parents' had a circle that represented the world. It made sense because they both loved to travel, but her's and Lexa's was a star. They met in a coffee shop, what did stars have to do with it?

Abby smiled at the mention of Lexa, "She seems lovely, even though I met her briefly. When will we properly be introduced to her? Your father is dying to meet her."

"Yeah and I want my double dates." Octavia jumped in. She said it jokingly but the look on her face was dead serious.

"Soon," Clarke smiled, "Very soon." 


	6. Chapter 6

One o'clock. She's sitting by the Panda Express checking her phone every five seconds. Where is Clarke? She's been sitting here for about ten minutes, always showing up early for everything. Two minutes pass by. Clarke is two minutes late. 

A young girl who appears to be a freshman walks up to her, "Hi, I saw you sitting here and I was wondering if I could join you?" When Lexa gives her a confused and slightly annoyed look, the girl explains herself. "It's just that I don't see a necklace or ring on your finger... I don't have a necklace either and-"

Clarke comes up behind the girl and rolls her eyes. She ignores her and directs her attention to Lexa, "Hey, sorry I'm late. I got caught up. Who's this?" Clarke asks, looking at the girl. 

"I'm Jessie, and you are?" The girl asks Clarke, clueless to everything going on. 

"This girl's soulmate." Clarke wrapped her arm around Lexa, a coy smile on her face.

All the color on the girl's face flushed away out of embarrassment. "I'm so, so sorry. I- I didn't know." She turned around and practically ran out of the food court. 

The two let out a laugh, "Geeze Clarke, could've been easier on her. It's not her fault that she didn't see a necklace."

Clarke pressed a kiss to the older girl's temple and made her way around the table to sit across from her. "I wasn't being mean. I was just pointing out that you're mine."

Lexa choked on her water and couldn't sustain the laugh that came rupturing out, "Yours?"

"Whether you like it or not, you're mine and I'm yours. The universe ships us. We're its OTP." Clarke leaned back, a wide smile on her face. Lexa started laughing and she quickly followed. As soon as the two calmed down, Clarke quickly turned serious, "So, I talked to my mom yesterday."

"What happened? Is everything okay?" Lexa asked, sitting up in her chair. She was worried that something bad may have happened. Over a million different scenarios crossed her mind all at once. 

"Oh yeah, everything is fine." Clarke informed her quickly after seeing the worry one her face. "She wants to meet you that's all." She was going to tell her about the necklaces instead, and the meaning of their symbol, but thought it best that it was a conversation worthy of another time. 

Her eyes lit up at the mention of meeting Clarke's mother. She technically already met her, but it was a quick hi and bye while Lexa was trying to make things right between the blonde and herself. "When?" Lexa was always good with parents and her mother seemed like a great conversationalist. She also wanted to know more about Clarke; embarrassing stories of her as a child, baby photos, silly habits she cannot break, etc. 

Clarke's face softened, "I don't know yet. I'll talk to her and get back to you on that." She smiled, grateful that Lexa was just as eager to meet her family as she was. "Octavia wants to meet you too."

Lexa laughed, "Anya wants to meet you as well. She might be a bit hard on you, however. She walked in on us yesterday morning when we were sleeping, after you know..." She referred to their night together, awkwardly, unsure if it was okay to talk about.

A blush crept across the blonde's face, her leg slightly twitching at the mention of that night. The ache between her thighs never went away. Even when she was alone that night after dinner, she couldn't release the tension with Octavia in the next room. She was never one to really masturbate, only doing it on rare occasions in the shower or home alone after a long day at school. However, now that she had Lexa, she felt that even if she did release the tension on her own, she wouldn't be fully satisfied. She needed Lexa to touch her. 

She stayed quiet, staring hungrily at the brunette. Her eyes turned dark, a mixture of lust and love. The light sky blue color of her eyes was now as dark as the ocean at night. Lexa recognized the look and swallowed nervously. 

"What time is your next class?" Clarke asked, changing the subject. She crossed her fingers under the table, hoping that Lexa's schedule will be free for at least the next hour. 

"Three." Lexa whispered, her mouth suddenly dry. Her hand dropped from the table and onto her thigh, digging her nails into her skin. The look Clarke was giving her was driving her insane. She needed to calm down and try to ignore the wetness being produced between her legs. 

Clarke leaned across the table and purred in her ear, "Want to head back to my loft?"

It took so much strength for Lexa not to tackle the blonde right then and there. She has been thinking about the promise she made to Clarke ever since she left her apartment that morning. She nodded her head quickly, eyes widening at the feeling of Clarke's hand tucking a stray hair behind her ear. The contact sent shivers down her spine. She practically jumped out of her seat, taking Clarke's hand and leading them out of the cafeteria. 

If she remembered correctly, Clarke's loft was right across the street. They walked quickly, a large, satisfied grin never leaving the blonde's face. Lexa caught a glimpse of the café where the two met and smiled to herself. If it wasn't for the need to please Clarke and their time crunch, she would've stopped and reminisce with her about their first meeting. But, now was not the time. Lexa picked up their pace and rushed them into the building. 

No one was around, so Lexa swiftly pushed Clarke against the door while she was reaching into her pocket for the keys. Clarke looked up at the brunette in surprise, her eyes becoming darker. They were practically black now. Lexa took her lips between her own and kissed her hard. She kissed her as if she was dying. Like she couldn't breathe without the feeling of the other blonde's lips on her own. Clarke pulled back, gasping for air and attempting to reach into her pocket again to retrieve the keys. 

Lexa immediately missed the contact and couldn't wait. She started kissing down her neck, sucking on the soft skin. Clarke gasped at the feeling but didn't protest. She struggled to find the lock, unable to look to see where it was exactly. Her back was pressed against the door and Lexa wouldn't pull away long enough for Clarke to turn around and properly unlock the door. Although, they could've been inside and in bed already if she would just take a two second break. But, Clarke wasn't going to complain. This was hot. 

Finally, she managed to somehow get the key in the lock and open the door. Clarke almost fell to the ground with how swiftly the door opened, all her weight being against it. Lexa helped to keep her balanced, even while she was trailing kisses down her neck. Clarke gently pulled away from Lexa so she could lead them to the bedroom. Lexa sighed, but allowed Clarke to guide them. 

Once inside the bedroom, Lexa slammed the door and pushed Clarke onto the bed. She let Clarke dominate her the other night, but she was not one to typically become submissive. It was new - being a bottom - but with Clarke, she didn't mind. However, she now needed to fulfill her promise to Clarke. 

They didn't take the time to strip one another, only having about an hour. Lexa just took off her leggings, planning to make it quick. But, Clarke knew that it may take awhile for her to come, no one ever able to do it quickly, let alone at all. She was very hard to satisfy. But, once Lexa thrusted a finger into her sex, everything became foggy. The feeling of a tongue lapping around her clit and the repeated pumping in and out of her sex made her think that for once, she might be done within ten minutes. If that were to happen, then Lexa is definitely Clarke's soulmate. 

Lexa craved this. She needed to taste Clarke. She needed to show the blonde how it felt to be properly fucked. She wasn't able to take her time, sadly. But, this didn't feel like a quick hookup. It still contained the love that she felt their first night together. 

A second finger was added and her pace increased. Within seconds, Clarke's back arched off of the bed and tremors ran through her body. Thank God nobody was home. A loud shriek came from the blonde's lip as she came undone. For almost two days, she was unable to release the ache between her legs. Her body needed this. Not just the release, but Lexa. 

After several long seconds, Clarke's body stilled, her legs slightly shaking as a result of the intense orgasm she just experienced. Never has she came that hard or well before. No one has ever been able to produce that kind of pleasure for her. Lexa was definitely the one for her. 

The brunette looked down at Clarke, slowly licking the blonde's juices from her fingers. She never broke eye contact, causing Clarke to ache more and growl at the sight. How could anyone be more sexy? This girl was going to kill her. 

She pulled Lexa in for a kiss, tasting herself on the brunette's tongue. She moaned into her mouth and Lexa pulled back with a coy grin. "How was that?" She asked, innocently. Clarke pulled her back in for a kiss, giving her all the answers she needed. 

They were definitely going to be late for class. 

 

-

 

Her palms were sweaty. No matter how many times she wiped them on her jeans, they wouldn't dry up. What if Clarke's mom hands her a glass of wine and she drops it? What if when she shakes her father's hands, he becomes disgusted and thinks there is something wrong with her? Lexa didn't understand why she was nervous. She was great with parents. When Clarke called her earlier that week to tell her about this weekend, she was actually excited. She wanted to meet her parents. She wanted to know more about Clarke Griffin. But for some reason, she's now intimidated with the idea. 

"Hey baby, is everything okay?" Clarke asked, noticing how tense the brunette was. They were currently sitting in the back of a cab on their way to the subway. Her family didn't live far, but they did have to take a train to get there in a cheaper and more timely manner. 

Lexa snapped out of her thoughts and back into reality, "Hm, what? Yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" She asked rhetorically, her heartbeat slowing down. Clarke started calling her by the pet name after their hookup a couple of weeks ago at lunch. Usually she would be opposed to such a cliché like "baby," but the way it sounded coming from the blonde made her stomach flip. 

Clarke chuckled at her girlfriend, "I don't know, maybe because you're meeting my parents for the first time. Don't worry, it's okay to be nervous." She reached over to place her hand on her thigh. 

"I'm not nervous." Lexa defended, earning another laugh from the blonde. She just smiled at her, admiring the way her eyes lit up. For just a moment, all her nerves disappeared. She was great with parents and even if she wasn't, she managed to impress a girl like Clarke; that just proves she can do the impossible. 

 

-

 

They stand outside of the front door awkwardly. Clarke is unsure if she should hold Lexa's hand or maybe have her arm around her. She didn't know how close she should stand, either. Her parents know they are soulmates, so they should be comfortable being all couple like, but it was  _her parents._ She isn't sure how they would react to PDA. 

Her father opened the door with a big smile on his face and laughed at how the two girls were standing shoulder to shoulder, awkward smiles on their faces. "Clarke!" He greeted in delight, embracing his daughter in a warm hug. When he pulled away to look at Lexa, his face became more stern. There was still a smile on his face, but it wasn't as big as the one he had when he opened the door. He looked her up and down, as if trying to decide if she was a good match for Clarke or not. Finally, he extended his hand and introduced himself, "Jake."

Lexa exhaled a sigh of relief, not realizing that she was holding her breath the entire time. She took his hand and shook it firmly, glad that her palms were no longer sweaty. "Alexandria, but please, call me Lexa. It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Griffin."

"Jake." He corrected, repeating himself. He smiled at the girl, "Mr. Griffin makes me feel old."

"Okay, Jake." She corrected herself, laughing lightly. 

Clarke clapped her hands, gaining their attention, "Alright, let's not just stand out here; it's cold!"

They all laughed and Jake let them into the house. Lexa took in her surroundings, admiring the decor. There was a painting hanging in the hall that immediately caught her attention. She stopped in front of it, admiring it. 

Jake stopped next to her, "It's one of Clarke's. All the artwork in the house is hers." 

"It's beautiful." She replied, never taking her eyes off of the painting. She was never really on to admire artwork. When she went to museums she would always skip the art exhibit, not interested in paintings or landscapes. However, Clarke's work seemed almost like a snapshot, but more beautiful. If this is what all art was like, she would stop by every art exhibit for the rest of her life. 

Clarke appeared next to her after hearing the compliment, "It's my first piece. Well, first one that I didn't throw out and actually liked."

"What was your inspiration for it?" Lexa asked, taking her eyes off of the piece to look at Clarke. 

"I thought the sky was pretty and I just wanted to paint something." She told her. That's how all of Clarke's art was. There was no real inspiration. All of her work was done during drunken nights when she couldn't think straight, when she had nothing else to do, or it was the night before a deadline. 

Lexa's lips mouthed "oh," as she nodded slightly to the blonde and turned her attention back to the painting. 

"Let me give you a tour of the house." Clarke said, taking her hand and guiding her through her parent's home. Lexa would stop at every painting, taking a minute or two to admire the work. Clarke just watched her the entire time. 

They walked into the kitchen, the final stop of the tour, and found Clarke's mom taking something out of the oven. She looked up and placed her oven mitts on the table, walking over to Lexa to give her a hug, "Lexa! It's so nice to properly meet you."

Lexa was taken back by the hug, slightly startled. However, she still returned the gesture and smiled, "It's so nice to properly meet you too, Mrs. Griffin."

"Please, call me Abby." She said, pulling away to look at the brunette. "We run on a first name basis in this household. It makes us feel younger."

"So your husband has told me." Lexa joked, earning her a laugh from Clarke's mom. She mentally patted herself on the back, no longer nervous. She was doing good, Clarke's parents seemed to be liking her so far. 

"Well, you're just in time for dinner. I made lasagna, Clarke's favorite."

Lexa thought of their past dates and how Clarke always ate or ordered pasta. She wasn't surprised that lasagna would be her favorite meal. 

Abby escorted them to the dining room and offered Lexa a glass of white wine that she gladly accepted. Her palms were no longer sweaty, so she was very successful in not dropping the glass. 

Conversation went smoothly. all the attention was directed towards Lexa, asking about college and family. They also asked about how the two met, earning them a good laugh. It was going so well that they didn't notice how late it was becoming. They didn't talk about Clarke's childhood or look through a baby album, Lexa being the center of attention for tonight. 

Dinner went great and so did desert. Clarke didn't feel right, though. She was happy that her family liked Lexa as much as she did, but it was all too perfect. She was waiting for something to go wrong. For someone to say the wrong thing, because nothing has ever gone right in her life. Something always went wrong when things seemed too good to be true. 

But yet, they made it home without any problems. "Your parents are great." Lexa complimented as they walked back to Clarke's loft. "A lot better than mine."

Clarke shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah, they're pretty cool, I guess." She wasn't lying. Everyone loved Clarke's parents, never wanting to leave her house because of them. Sometimes she thought she only had some friends because of her parents. "I'm sure yours were great, though."

Lexa shook her head, "No. they were good parents but when it came to socializing, they didn't really know how. They would always say the wrong things and nine times out of ten, a fight would break out. I lost a lot of friends because of them."

"Well they did a good job with you, you're pretty awesome and a great conversationalist." She bumped her with her shoulder, playfully and smiled.

"I have my aunt and uncle to thank for that. You have to meet them. They live in the city, not too far from here." Lexa told her, stopping when they made it to the loft. 

"I would love that." Clarke smiled and grabbed Lexa's hands. "Would you like to come inside?"

It was getting pretty late and Lexa knew that Octavia was home, hearing music playing through the door. As much as she would love to stay, she thought it was best not to. The night was already perfect and nothing good ever happens to Lexa, so she was afraid that she would mess things up pretty quick if she stayed. "Anya's actually waiting for me back home. I'll see you tomorrow, though?"

Clarke frowned, clearly disappointed, "Yeah, of course." She forced a smile on her face and leaned in to kiss Lexa goodnight. Despite her disappointment in Lexa not staying the night, everything went pretty smoothly. It would be short lived, though, she knew it would. 

 

- 

 

"Clarke, this is my Aunt Indra and Uncle Gustus." Lexa introduced what was left of her family to her girlfriend. "Gus is my dad's brother."

"It's a pleasure to meet you both." Clarke shook their hands. It's been a little over a week since Lexa met her family, and now she was meeting hers.

Indra gave a small smile, not showing her immediate approval of the girl. It wasn't that she didn't like Clarke, she was just afraid to have her get comfortable in case Lexa had any doubts again. 

Lexa noticed how her aunt was behaving very quickly and hoped that Clarke did not pick up on it. Even if she did, she didn't let it phase her. 

Gustus on the other hand had a large smile on his face. He liked Clarke despite only just meeting her. Lexa thinks he's just happy that she found her soulmate. 

A roast chicken was served for dinner, breaking the trend of eating pasta dishes for dates and family meetings. Conversation ran kind of smoothly, mainly consisting of Gustus asking Clarke questions. Indra stayed quiet with a polite smile on her face. Lexa watched her aunt for most of the dinner, slightly annoyed with her behavior. She was disappointed, but not surprised. 

They all moved to the living room where Gustus and Clarke's conversation continued. "Do you have any siblings?" He asked.

"No, it's just me." She answered and branched off of the subject, "Do you have any kids of your own?" 

Gustus frowned slightly, but quickly covered it up with a small smile, "No. Lexa's parents died in a car accident nine years ago when she was fourteen, a year after Indra and I got married. We took care of her, but didn't have time to have kids of our own." His voice was coated with sadness and longing. 

Clarke frowned, "I'm sorry to hear that."

He chuckled in an attempt to lighten the mood, "It's no biggie, Lexa is a blessing."

Lexa just sat there listening to the entire conversation. It pained her to hear it. She knows that she ruined her uncle's opportunity to have kids of his own. She was older when they took her in, therefore costing a lot more money to take care of. They were too busy making sure she was happy that they didn't focus on their own lives. By the time she left the house and went to school on scholarships, they were too old to have children. 

Indra jumped in, quickly changing the subject knowing how it affected Lexa. "What are you going to school for?" This was the first thing she's said to Clarke all night aside from "hello."

The blonde looked to her girlfriend nervously before answering. Her major was never anything she was super proud of sharing, knowing that people would judge her and think that she wouldn't amount to anything. The fact that this was the first thing Indra has said to her all night also meant that this was a pretty loaded question. One with a right and wrong answer. "Art history." She tried to say proudly and unashamed. 

Indra hummed shortly in question and disgust. It was obvious she was biting back a negative comment, not wanting to upset her niece. Yup, wrong answer. 

"Her artwork is absolutely breathtaking." Lexa jumped in, defending her girlfriend from the silent criticism her aunt was giving. "She's going to become someone, I know it."

Indra just nodded, not adding anything else to the conversation. A thick silence filled the room for a few minutes, nobody knowing what to say next. Gustus stood up and clapped his hands together, unable to bear the uncomfortable silence any longer. "Alright, it's getting late, I think it's time for you two to head home. It was a pleasure meeting you Clarke. We look forward to seeing you around."

Clarke rose from her seat and looked at Lexa a bit confused, she figured that she messed up by telling Indra her field of study. "Um, yeah, it's been great. Thank you so much for having me, it's been a real pleasure." She shook his hand and nodded to Indra, then followed Lexa out the door. 

"It went a lot better than I expected, to be honest." Lexa confessed. "I am disappointed in my aunt for being so protective and quiet, but it's understandable. She doesn't hate you though, so don't worry about that."

"She's intimidating." Clarke stated. "Your uncle is sweet, though."

Lexa laughed, "Yeah, Uncle Gus is great. He's a lot better than my father was."

Clarke frowned. She wanted to know more about Lexa's childhood and her parents, but she thought it best not to push the subject tonight. They already had a long night and she wasn't prepared to open this can of worms. 

They got back to Lexa's apartment and she was about to inviter her to spend the night when Clarke received a phone call. Lexa watched her take the call and the expression that took over her face said everything. Her heart shattered. Lexa knew that look. It was the same look she had when two policemen showed up to her door nine years ago. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for how long this update took. I had a very hard time writing this chapter and it had to be the most difficult thing I've ever written. I just hope it's good enough and that you all don't hate it.

_"Higher! Higher! I wanna fly higher!"_

_"I can't toss you any higher, Clarke!" Jake laughs, tossing his six year-old daughter in the air. One big toss and he catches her, swooping her back down to the ground. "I'm getting old," He sits down on the grass, catching his breath, "Either that or you're getting too big."_

_"I think it's both!" Clarke laughed, jumping on her father's back. "I want to be a pilot when I get older so I can fly higher than the birds!"_

_Jake laughed again, amused with how big of a dreamer his daughter is, "Oh really? That's pretty high! What kind of pilot would you be?"_

_"One that flies airplanes, duh." Clarke answered as if it was a stupid question. She was only six so she didn't understand that there were different types of pilots and different types of aircrafts that could be flown._

_"Are you sure you don't want to be an engineer like your dad?" Jake teased, hoping to influence his daughter to become just as successful as him in the future.  
_

_Clarke made a face in disgust, "No, that's what boys do!"_

_Jake's jaw dropped, feigning offense, "No! Plenty of women are engineers! Besides, anything a boy can do a girl can do, remember that."_

_"Anything?"_

_"Anything."_

_"Even love a girl?" Clarke asked shyly, staring down at the necklace that was almost too big for her small chest._

_Jake gave her a small, reassuring smile,"If fate guides you to a girl," he pointed to her necklace, "then yes, because fate is never wrong."_

 

-

 

She doesn't remember what happened. One minute she was standing outside of her soulmate's apartment and the next she was riding in the back of a taxi on her way to the hospital. Everything was silent. Everything was blurry. Her mind was blank, her expression the same. 

"Clarke! Clarke! Clarke!" Lexa said, trying to gain the attention of the blonde. She was sitting in the cab with her, but was sure that Clarke wasn't aware of it. Her heart was breaking for her. She knew what this feeling was like. She felt it when she was only fourteen. She could only imagine what her girlfriend was going through right now. 

The taxi came to a stop, but she stayed seated, frozen in the backseat. Lexa payed off the driver and ran around to her door, opening it. Clarke still didn't snap out of her haze. Lexa tugged on her jacket, repeating her name in attempt to remove her from the cab and gain her attention. Finally, Clarke snapped back into reality and it all came rushing back at her at the sight of the hospital. 

She answered the phone call from her mother, unsure of what she was going to say. It was ten o'clock at night and she was pretty sure that her mom was working at that time. There wasn't even a "hello" exchanged. The information came at her quickly, so fast that she could barely comprehend what she was being told. She didn't want to comprehend it. 

"It's your father." Abby said through uncontrolled sobs, "There's been an accident, he's- come to the hospital now." Then the line went dead.

Clarke dropped her phone on the concrete floor, shattering her screen. She stood frozen still in front of Lexa. Everything went blurry. Her mind went blank. Lexa started shouting. She didn't ask what was wrong, already knowing. She picked up the phone and tried to drag Clarke out of the building to the street so they could hail a cab, but the blonde wouldn't move. She couldn't move. Her feet were glued to the ground. Lexa ended up carrying her down the flight of stairs and shoved her into the back of a taxi. 

Now, here they were. The hospital where Clarke's father probably passed in. She wasn't 100% sure that he was dead, but her mind immediately assumed the worst. She took Lexa's hand and allowed her to guide her through the sliding doors and into the Emergency Room. 

There was a nurse sitting behind her desk, typing away at her computer. Her expression was calm and serene as if there wasn't any emergencies going on at the moment. There were about four people in the waiting room, all on their phones or reading a magazine, their expressions the same as the nurse. Clarke filled up with anger at the other people. Her father could be dead and everyone was just sitting around as if it were a normal day at the park. A part of her tried to tell her that these are strangers and that the nurse sees this type of stuff every day, but she was so angry. She wanted to scream at everyone to show some respect and act like they were mourning over the possible death of her father. 

Lexa saw the darkness in her eyes, the anger, fear, and hurt. She knew this look all too well, she could feel all the memories rushing back. She felt all the pain that she felt nine years ago when she found out her parents died. She quickly pushed away the feeling - now was not the time. She needed to be here for Clarke. Her girlfriend came before her, and she always will. 

Abby appeared in the waiting room, emerging from the long halls. She was still wearing her scrubs, the whole situation conflicting with her work schedule. Her eyes were swollen and her face was wet with tears. She was no longer crying like she was on the phone, but tears still silently fell down her cheeks, a lifeless expression on her face. 

Clarke rose from her spot where she was crying into Lexa's side, and hugged her mother. They held onto one another tightly, as if something terrible were to happen if either were to let go. Lexa sat and watched the interaction, tears silently falling down her face as well. She wiped at them away quickly, not wanting to show any emotion. Now was not the time, she needed to be the rock for this family. 

After several minutes, the two finally pulled back from one another. Clarke's voice cracked and she could barely muster out a whisper, "Is he...?"

She didn't need to finish her sentence for Abby to know what she was asking. She shook her head, "No, he isn't. He's in surgery right now, but I don't know what's going on."

"What happened?"

Abby guided Clarke back to the chairs where they could both sit, "He was driving home from a friend's house, and a drunk driver ran a red light and hit his car head on. The guy behind the wheel died, and your father was rushed to the hospital and is currently having surgery. They won't let me in there because I'm family. I can't help, I'm sorry."

Clarke let out a small sob and ducked her head into Lexa's side. Lexa rubbed her back in an attempt to sooth her, but there wasn't really much she could do. Her father was in the hospital because of a drunk driver, how do you comfort someone about that?

The three stayed quiet, silent tears falling down Abby's face and Clarke finding comfort in Lexa's side. Lexa had a tight grip on Clarke, trying to protect her from whatever news could be thrown at them at any moment. She kept her eyes fixated on the clock in front of them; one hour has passed. Only one hour.

The hours ticked by slowly and eventually, Clarke fell asleep in Lexa's arms. The silence that filled the waiting room was eerie. Lexa could hear her own heart beating, she could hear everyone's heart beating. It was a fast-unsteady rhythm caused by the uncertainty of what was happening in the Operation Room.

Finally, after a painful five hours of silence and paranoia, a doctor emerged from the halls, "Dr. Griffin?" He whispered, gaining Abby's attention. She opened her tired eyes and looked up at the surgeon in front of her, Lexa nudged Clarke a bit to wake her up. Once the doctor had everyone's attention, he began to explain what had happened in the O.R. "Your husband suffered major internal bleeding in his intestines and liver. There was also debris lodged in between his ribs, puncturing one of his lungs. We managed to stop the bleeding and removed the debris, patching up the damaged lung. However, he lost a lot of blood and is still very unstable and will need to be under our intensive watch and care."

"But he's okay, right? He's alive?" Clarke asked, not hearing all the information being given to them. All she wanted was to hear that her father was alive. 

"He is alive, yes." The doctor reassured her, a small smile appearing on his lips. Clarke let out a small cry in relief that her father was okay. 

"When can we see him?" Abby asked. 

"He's in recovery right now, but only immediate family is allowed inside the ICU."

Clarke looked over at Lexa and frowned, knowing she would have to leave. "Go see your dad and give him my thoughts. Call me later, okay?" Lexa told her, rising from her seat slowly to depart from the hospital. 

The blonde nodded, "Thank you for staying with us. I really appreciate it."

"Of course," Lexa responded and gave her a quick kiss on the forehead before leaving.

 

-

 

Silent tears fell down her face in the back seat of the cab. It wasn't until she got through the doors of her apartment and into her own bed did she allow herself to break down. This was all too much for her. She held on the strong façade and was a rock for both Abby and Clarke the whole night, now it was her turn. 

She sobbed into her pillow, masking her screams to keep her roommate from waking up. She couldn't breathe. The tears became too much and eventually she passed out from all the pain in her chest from the memories of her ruined childhood. 

The next morning Lexa woke up still in her clothes from last night with her head resting on a very damp pillow. Her eyes hurt and were swollen from all the tears that were spilled. Her mouth was dry, dehydrated from the violent sobs. She didn't think twice about it though, because the memory of what happened to Clarke last night hit her like a train. She rolled over and found her phone on the other side of the bed and attempted to click it on, but the screen remained black. "Fuck," she muttered to herself; it was dead. 

She sighed and rolled over again, this time to get out of bed and find the charger by her desk. She plugged her phone in and waited the five minutes it took for it to turn back on. There were no messages. She pondered if she should text her or not, just to check in, but she felt that it might be an inconvenience. She was with her father, and despite what the doctor said about him being okay, something detrimental could still happen. 

Lexa left her phone on her desk to charge and went to shower. She didn't see Anya when she walked out of her bedroom and figured that she was already at work. She silently turned on the tap and didn't listen to music or sing like she always did. She showered in silence and didn't even notice the tears falling down her face. 

When she finished showering and returned to her room, there were still no messages on her phone. She sat on the edge of the bed, still wrapped in a towel, and thought about ways to distract herself while she waited for Clarke to contact her. There was only one thing she deemed appropriate at the moment. She quickly got dressed, unplugged her phone and grabbed her wallet. 

The flower shop was lovely, one of her most favorite places to be. She loved flowers, the smells, the colors. They were beautiful and always brought her peace and joy when she needed it most. She also loved the expressions on other's faces when they would receive flowers, so much love and happiness. She walked slowly around the shop, taking in every color and smell. She passed by the lilacs and the orchids, lightly tracing her fingers along the pedals. 

After surveying the shop a couple of times, she made her way to the front of the store and picked out a bouquet of lilies. Her mother always loved lilies. Her father would bring them home every Friday after work to surprise his wife, and Lexa will never forget the smile it brought to her mother's face. She was always so beautiful when she smiled.

The florist wrapped the bouquet beautifully as Lexa payed with her credit card. She took the bouquet and walked out of the shop, taking in one last whiff of the flowers inside. At the edge of the sidewalk she hailed a cab and gave the driver her destination. The look he gave her was funny and sentimental, but she brushed it off. She's young and looks a lot younger than she really is, so she's used to that look from strangers. 

Twenty minutes went by and they pulled over. She payed off the driver and thanked him, earning her a sad nod from the man. She just brushed it off again. It was a beautiful day. The sun was out and it was a lot warmer than it has been the past few weeks. It had to be at least fifty degrees. Her father would've loved this weather. It would've been a great day to go to the park and ride their bikes. He always enjoyed the cold, maybe that's where Lexa got her love for the winter months from. 

She walked through the isles between the headstones, careful not to step on anyone's graves. She stayed quiet and kept her phone on silent to show respect to the dead. A few rows down and she stopped at a relatively large headstone that displayed two names; Michael and Diana Woods. They were buried together, their necklaces buried with them.

It's been a while since Lexa has visited them, only coming on the anniversary of their death. When she was fourteen, after the funeral, she would bring a book and come read to them everyday. It wasn't until her uncle started to figure out where she would go everyday after school did he make her stop. Later she understood that it was to help her grieve better and move on with her life. She lost all her friends and shut out everyone she loved most after the accident, he just wanted to help her. 

She put the lilies down on the grave and took a seat, leaning against the headstone. She hasn't done this since she was fourteen, but for the first time in nine years, she was going to talk to the dead. She wasn't sure if they could hear her, but a part of her believes that they could, just like she believes that they are still together, wherever they are. 

"Hey mom, hey dad." She whispered, stunning herself with her own voice breaking the thick silence around her. "I know I haven't talked to you in awhile but I finally met my soulmate. Her name is Clarke, you would've loved her. Uncle Gus likes her and I think Indra does too, even though she won't admit it." She chuckled to herself, wiping away the tears slowly falling down her cheeks. "Something happened last night, though, and I'm terrified. Her dad got into an accident and he isn't doing too well. I'm scared that he won't make it. I'm scared that Clarke will end up understanding the same pain that I went through when I lost you two. I don't want her to go through that. I don't want her to lose her spark.

"It's just that, she has so much love to give and there's always this twinkle in her eyes. She is always happy, just genuinely happy. But, I saw her last night and the twinkle was gone. It hurt so bad to see her like this. I don't know what will happen if she lost her dad. What if she becomes distant and pushes me away? I'll understand if she does, but it'll hurt me too much to leave her. I just love her so much and I don't want to lose her. I can't lose anyone else."

The tears came faster now, and Lexa stared off into the distance thinking about what she had said.  _I just love her so much._ Never has she said those words out loud before and now that they were out in the open, it became more of a reality. Her chest started to ache. She was probably going to lose the woman she loved, the only other person she loved more than her own parents. She allowed herself to sob, pulling her knees up to her chest. She silently apologized to the dead around her - she broke the silence. 

 

-

 

_The phone rings a little after midnight, it's her father. Clarke sits up in a panic and worries about why he may be calling. She just talked to her mother that morning, telling her the good news and everything seemed okay._

_"Hello?" Clarke answered, her voice coated with worry._

_"So I heard the news. Her name is Lexa, huh?" Her dad cheered and Clarke could practically hear the smile through the phone._

_Clarke laughed and sighed in relief, "Yeah, we had our first date last night. She's amazing."_

_"When do I get to meet her?"_

_"I don't want to scare her away just yet."_

_"Well she isn't really your soulmate if she gets scared of your old man so easily. Besides, I'm a nice guy. The shotgun I'll be holding in my hands when she sees me definitely won't be intimidating." Jake joked, earning him a laugh from his daughter. "Tell me about her."_

_So Clarke told him about her. She told him all about their dinner and how they went to the same school. How they connected their necklaces at the end of the night and she walked her back to the loft and didn't try to make a move. She took things slow. She respected Clarke. Jake was more than happy to hear that._

_"Love at first sight?" He asked._

_"I think so." Clarke whispered, "But I mean, I don't know. I've never been in love so I don't know. It's too early to tell."_

_"It's never too early. The universe set you two up for a reason, it's destiny. You love her and she loves you, it is as simple as that." Jake reassured her and he was met with silence, knowing that Clarke was probably nodding on the other end but didn't realize that he can't see her. "I need to meet her soon though just to make sure. I want to make sure you're safe with her once your mom and I are gone."_

_"You act like you're going to be leaving me soon," Clarke laughed nervously, "You're only in your forties, Dad."_

_Jake turned serious, "You never know, love. I just want to make sure you're safe with her in case God forbids something does happen to me or your mom. We're never promised tomorrow, Clarke-"_

_"So we have to live in the now," Clarke finishes his sentence. It was the same words that he would tell her all the time growing up. They had to live their life in the moment and chase after their dreams because they never knew what tomorrow could bring. The world was a scary place with unpredictable events being thrown at them every day._

_"I just want you to stay safe and I hope this Lexa girl can do just that."_

_"I think she can, Dad, actually, I know she can."_

 

-

 

He's asleep. It's been a few days and Clarke hasn't left his side. She's been skipping class, but Octavia has informed her professors of the situation. Good thing they loved her, because they excused her from all the work she was and will be missing.

Clarke sat by the bed holding his hand. He has only been awake very briefly every several hours. The doctors are saying that he isn't getting any better and are keeping a closer eye on him just in case. The last thing he said to her in his brief moments of consciousness is, "I'm here."

Abby went back to work, unable to take time off at the hospital. She had too many surgeries that could not be rescheduled. But, she did stop by the room every chance she could to check in and bring Clarke some food. 

Octavia has stopped by to check in as well, she was hurting just as much as Clarke was. Jake was like her father, too. He helped take care of her and her brother when their mom died in high school. Octavia knew exactly what Clarke was going through and it hurt, because she too was living it all over again. 

Lexa hasn't stopped by. Clarke never contacted her, not wanting her to see her like this. It was all too much and the last thing she needed was someone who she's only known for a little over a month trying to comfort her. Who she needed most right now was her family, and that only consisted of Octavia and Abby. She would be family one day, yes, but for now, all she is is Clarke's girlfriend.

She hasn't bathed since the accident and has barely slept for more than a few hours a night. The beeps on the monitor keep her awake, her eyes fixated on the screen, watching the slow, steady rhythm of his heart beat.

It was around midnight and she had just closed her eyes. For the first time in three days, she might actually get a decent night's sleep. That's when it happened.

She woke up to the sound of a nurse yelling, calling for the doctor. She was yanked from the side of the bed and pushed outside of the room, forced to watch the scene unravel through the window. Everything was a blur. All she could hear were people yelling and the faint sound of a flat line.

They tried. She witnessed how hard they tried. Her feet were glued to the floor and everything went silent. The doctor was speaking to her now, telling her news that she could not hear. She didn't need to hear it, she knew. The tears broke free, the droplets of water hitting the clean floor. She didn't know she was crying. She didn't even know she was falling. Everything just went black.

She woke up in a hospital bed, hooked up to an IV. Her mom was sitting by her side holding her hand. It looks like she hasn't slept in days, fresh tears still pooling from her eyes. For a moment she was confused. She forgot about what happened. She forgot about the accident and forgot about the scene she witnessed a few hours ago in the other room. Her mind was just blank and for a split second, her heart didn't hurt and she was okay. Content. 

But, the bump on her head started to hurt a little too much and reality is a bitch and slapped her right in the face. The look in her mom's eyes said it all and it all came rushing back to her. The phone call. Her father. The crash cart. Flat line. White sheet. Black. 

She couldn't breathe. She was drowning. She scratched at her throat, gasping for air. It was all too much. It was all too much. He was only 48. It was not his time. This wasn't suppose to happen. He was supposed to see her graduate college. He was supposed to walk her down the aisle. He was supposed to hold her and Lexa's first child. He was supposed to be there for it all. Just like that, and he's gone. This isn't real. It can't be real. It's all a sick nightmare that she will wake up from. It's just a nightmare. 

Everything went black again. The crying was too much. 

 

-

 

The phone rang. Lexa could barely sleep, torn between texting Clarke and waiting for her to text her. She was very unproductive in class and could barely eat. When Clarke finally called she was relieved, but it quickly turned into a phone call she regretted answering.

"He's gone." Clarke whispered. "It happened last night."

Her hand immediately jumped up to cover her mouth as she choked back a sob, "I'm so sorry, Clarke." That was all she could say. There really isn't much you can say about this situation. You can never comfort someone at a time like this. It's impossible.

"The funeral is on Saturday. I want you to be there."

"I'll be there. I promise." Lexa whispered and the line went dead. Here she goes again, another funeral. She has to witness what will be the toughest moment in Clarke's life. She has to watch her girlfriend bury her father and there is nothing she can do to ease the pain. All she could do was be the rock that she needed. The shoulder to cry on and the punching bag that she takes her frustration towards the world out on.

 

-

 

Quite a few people showed up. Jake was a famous engineer, after all. Coworkers, extended family, and friends all gathered to mourn the loss of a good man. The pastor read some lines from the bible and spoke about how he was a good father and is with the Lord now. Nobody ever listens to what a pastor says at a funeral, it's all recycled lines that don't come from the heart. It's nothing. He didn't know Jake like they did. 

Abby was the first to speak, reading the eulogy she had written out. "The whole soulmate concept is crazy to me. It never made any sense, but then again, neither does much in this world. The only thing that made sense in my life was Jake and my daughter, Clarke, even though she too could be hard to understand. No one has ever gotten me like Jake does. He was selfless and always put his family before himself. I don't know where he is now, but I hope he is watching over us. I will be with you one day, my love." It was a short speech, one that was clearly hard for Abby to write. She didn't want to share too much, not wanting to give away too much about the man. He was hers and she wished to keep it that way. 

It was Clarke's turn to speak, now. "I remember when I first told my parents I didn't want to follow in their footsteps. They were furious when I said I wanted to be an artist instead. I remember being in my room that night, staring at my art supplies and crying, knowing that I was a disappointment to them. But, my dad came in and said to me, 'Clarke, we're never promised tomorrow, so you must live in the now.' I didn't really understand what he meant at first, but then I got it. He wasn't upset that I wanted to be an artist, just as long as I was happy. He was the first person to support my dream and has been the inspiration for many of my early pieces. He was my rock, my role model, and my best friend. He still is. I don't think I would be as strong and independent as I am today without him. I know he will always be with me. When I graduate, I know he'll be right by my side cheering me on. Even when I'm going through a rough patch in life and I think that I'm alone, I won't really be, because he'll be there with a hand on my shoulder still cheering me on. He'll always be with me, forever and always."

The casket was dropped into the ground, and everyone finally left the graveyard to return to the church. Lexa spoke to Abby after it was long over and apologized for her loss. "It hurt," Abby said, "I felt it. I was just finished with surgery and I was taking off my scrubs when I felt it. It's an indescribable pain, but I felt him die." She tapped her finger against her chest, just above her heart. "The universe doesn't lie when they say you're connected. It's quite literal. It doesn't make any sense, but I felt his pain and now I just feel empty. He's gone. Gone..."

She broke down, something she has been doing a lot lately and Lexa held her, offering her a shoulder to cry on. Clarke watched the interaction from a distance, contemplating what she was about to do next. After her mother got herself together, she walked over to Lexa and asked to speak with her outside. 

"Thank you for being here," Clarke started, her fingers wrapped tightly around something in her hand. "It's just, I have to give this back to you." She held out her palm and loosened her fingers, revealing her half of the whole necklace. 

Lexa looked down at the silver and back up at Clarke, questionably. "I don't understand?"

"I can't be with you. Not now. I'm falling apart and I just don't want to take you down with me. You deserve happiness in this world, and I can't give you that. I'm sorry, Lexa, but take the necklace and go. Move on with your life and find someone who can treat you the way you deserve to be treated, not someone who is going to be mourning the death of her father for the rest of her life."

Lexa kept herself together, she knew this would happen. The one thing she feared most was happening, Clarke was losing herself. She was watching her break down. She wanted to tell her that the pain wouldn't last forever, that it would become bearable and she would be happy again. She wanted to tell her that she will go down with her and do whatever she could to make her better again. She wanted to be selfish and beg her not to push her away because she was all she had left. But, she couldn't say any of these things. It wouldn't be fair to Clarke. She needed to mourn, and if the best way she could do that was without Lexa than so be it. So, she took the necklace from her hand and said, "I understand," because, she loved her enough to let go. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry for how long it has taken me to update. Ever since school has started I have been having trouble finding time to update this. Just know that I will NEVER abandon this fic! Updates will be taking a lot longer and I am very sorry for that. This chapter is a lot shorter than others and isn't really all to great, but it is setting up for the next chapter, so bear with me. As always, I appreciate you all so much! Thank you for reading!

Lexa decided to walk home from the service. Or, at least she tried. The chapel was about ten miles outside of the city. She made it about three miles until the cold finally became too much and she was forced to hail a cab.

She doesn't exactly know why she decided to walk. Perhaps it was to give herself time to think before she got home. But think about what, exactly? How she should've fought with Clarke? How she should've told her the best way for her to recover was to have her help? How she's been through it all before and wouldn't mind doing it all again just to be with her? To help her? But that would all end up becoming a big scene in front of people who were mourning the death of Jake Griffin. 

It's all in the past now. Lexa made her decision. It was a decision made with her head and not her heart. This wasn't a break up. It couldn't be a break up, _they're soulmates_. Clarke needs to be surrounded by family right now, and whether she likes it or not, her and Lexa have only known each other for a little over a month. 

Her phone vibrates in her back pocket as she unlocked the door to her apartment. Her heart stopped. Was it Clarke? She was disappointed to retrieve the phone and see that it was just a friend request for Snapchat. For a moment there, she had hope. Hope that she shouldn't have had. She knew better than to have hope the day she buried her parents six feet under the ground.

The sound of the History Channel filled the apartment; Anya was home. Lexa threw her phone onto the side table and sighed loudly, gaining her best friend's attention. Anya quickly turned off the TV and frowned, "How was the funeral?"

"It was a funeral." Lexa scoffed. 

Her roommate shook her head, "I'm sorry, dumb question. How's Clarke doing? I expected you to be with her helping her through this right now." That's when Lexa broke down. She stayed calm the entire way home. She didn't allow a single tear to trail down her cheeks. But, she was home now, facing the one person she trusted the most in this world. She couldn't hold it in anymore. She fell to her knees and buried her face in her hands, her sobs rattling her entire body. "Oh no." Anya whispered, rushing to her friend's side. 

"We broke up." Lexa sobbed.

It took a moment for Anya to comprehend what it is she had said, Lexa being hard to understand because of her sobbing. Finally, it clicked, "Why?! What happened?!"

Lexa attempted to get herself back together. She took deep breaths and wiped away the tears. She sniffled and held her chin up high, calming down. "She wants me to be happy and apparently I can't be happy with her."

"What do you mean?"

"She thinks she'll never be happy again and that she'll be a brooding mess for the rest of her life. She doesn't want my life to turn to shit because of her sadness basically."

"Did you tell her that she's wrong? That you've been through this before and that time heals all wounds?" As much as Anya hated clichés, that one always stayed true. 

Lexa shook her head, "There was no use in arguing with her. Especially not at her father's service."

"So what now?"

"Now I wait. She'll come back, I'm sure of it." Lexa was speaking to herself now, trying to reassure herself that this was not the end. 

Anya frowned, "Lexa... What if she doesn't?"

She stayed quiet for a moment, realizing that there is a possibility that Clarke won't come back. Sure it's crossed her mind on the way home, but she never allowed the thought to stick long enough to ponder. She let out a sigh before answering her friend, her voice cracking while she choked back the tears, "Sometimes we lose our soulmates and that's okay."

 

-

 

Octavia sat on the opposite end of the couch where Clarke sat buried underneath a blanket. The brunette sighed before addressing the elephant in the room, "Why'd you do it?"

Clarke opened her eyes and looked at her friend, aware of what she was referring too but didn't want to give in, "What are you talking about?"

"Lexa." She said, her voice soft and filled with compassion, "Why'd you break up with her at the funeral?"

"I don't want to talk about this, O."

"Well, I think we should. Have you seen her tumblr? It's pretty fucking depressing right now." Octavia attempted to joke, but failed. The blonde didn't crack a smile and her eyes filled with more sadness, turning a darker shade of blue than she has seen before. 

"I'm no good for her." Clarke whispered, mumbling into the blanket.

"Why? Because you're mourning Jake's death? Anyone would understand that you're not going to be yourself for awhile and Lexa of all people would understand the most. I mean, she's been through this too-"

Clarke snapped, cutting her off, "You don't understand."

"Then explain it to me." Octavia raised her voice in just the slightest, clearly annoyed. 

The blonde took in a deep breath and straightened herself on the couch, looking to Octavia, "Lexa has already lost her parents, I don't want her to go through this again. All the mourning and the pain. I just don't want her to have to deal with it. I know it will get easier, but it doesn't feel like it right now. If we stayed together I'd just end up pushing her away and making her hate herself. She'll end up heading to this dark and scary place that I am in right now and I don't want that to happen. She's the most beautiful thing I have in this world and I don't want to ruin it and turn her into this darkness that can't be fixed." 

Octavia got up and moved to sit next to her best friend, wrapping her arm around her, "I get it. I don't agree with it, but I understand. But, how do you know that breaking up with her didn't make her this dark person? She needs you Clarke, and you need her."

"Once I get better maybe I'll contact her if she hasn't already moved on."

"You can't do that. You're playing with her heart this way." 

"It's not like I'm going out and fucking other people! I'm taking a break and doing what is best for me right now! The last thing I need is to worry about someone else!" Clarke screamed, her voice cracking and tears falling freely down her face. Her heart ached, God it ached. She wanted to be with Lexa more than anything, but she needs to mourn her father first.

Octavia just nodded her head and dropped the subject. She reached for the remote on the coffee table and clicked on the television, her arm wrapped around Clarke, comforting the blonde until she fell asleep on her shoulder. 

 

-

 

One month. Anya is locked in her room studying for her finals. It's December and the last week of the semester. Lexa arrives home early after taking her exams, finishing her course work before her roommate. She knows that she should probably head out, let Anya study in peace, but there's really no where for her to go. The streets are busier than usual with holiday shoppers and the snow doesn't help anyone move at a quicker pace. 

Lexa walks lightly through the apartment and throws her scarf and jacket on her bed and retrieves her earbuds from her desk. She plugs them into her phone and plays music at a high volume, sticking her phone in her back pocket. She goes into the closet and finds the small, beaten box labeled "XMAS". She pulls out decorations and places them throughout the small apartment. Lights are strung over the doors, looping around the apartment. Scented candles are placed in a variety of places and are lit, making her home warmer and more illuminate. 

She leaves the apartment and heads down to the building's basement, unlocking their storage gate and retrieving miscellaneous holiday items. She heads back up to the apartment and places the small, fake, white Christmas tree on the coffee table and smiles. Her and Anya are celebrating the holiday at her Aunt Indra's home, but it still felt nice to decorate the room. It felt more like Christmas and was a great distraction for Lexa. 

Anya emerges from her room, her eyes bloodshot and lips chapped. She heads towards the kitchen but pauses in the living room looking around. She looks at Lexa and gives her a small smile, "Nice." She says and goes to get a glass of water before retreating back into her room. 

Lexa laughs to herself and smiles again. She takes a seat on the couch and unlocks her phone and opens Snapchat. She snaps a quick picture of the small tree and captions it "Holiday Spirit!" with holiday emojis and posts it on her story. She starts to scroll through her Snapchat and watches other people's stories. Most are about the snow and the busy hustle in the mall filled with holiday shoppers. Others are of textbooks with complaints about finals and how they all want to drop out of college. It's one story in particular that catches her attention, however. For the first time in a month, Clarke Griffin has posted a Snapchat story. 

It is a photo of Octavia and a tall dark man covered in tinsel. The caption reads, "Christmas tree or Lincoln? 90% of people get this wrong." Lexa chuckled at the photo, realizing that the man was Octavia's boyfriend. The story changed to another of a selfie of Clarke and a tan boy with dark, curly hair and freckles. He looked to be in his mid-20s. The caption read, "Looked who showed up!!" 

Her heart ached a bit. Who was this boy? Why is it that Clarke posts on social media for the first time in weeks with him? She re-watches the story and has mixed feelings about how the blonde looks genuinely happy. There is a tinge of sadness in her eyes, but a small mix of happiness as well. 

She locks the phone and returns to decorating the apartment, trying to distract herself from the pain eating away at her chest. 

 

-

 

The five of them sit in the living room of Clarke and Octavia's loft, gathered around the Christmas tree sipping on hot chocolate whilst in their pajamas. Clarke is sitting on the floor with her back against the couch that Abby and Octavia's brother, Bellamy, rest on. Lincoln and Octavia are cuddled in the love seat, staying warm underneath a blanket while Octavia takes pictures of the celebration and posts them on Snapchat. 

Clarke plays Santa and passes around the gifts to her family. Though she is only biologically related to her mother, she doesn't know where she would be without the other three people that sit in this room. They are her family. Her heart aches with the absence of her father, and aches just a bit more as she watches Octavia and Lincoln.

After opening gifts and cleaning up the mess of wrapping paper on the floor, Clarke excuses herself to her room for a moment. Tears escape her eyes as she clenches her chest and whispers, "I miss you," into the empty room. It's directed towards her father, but it really is for more than just him. 

She walks to her nightstand and grabs her phone. She unlocks it and clicks on a contact that she hasn't heard from in months. With a deep breath she types a text. It's short and simple, it comes off rather friendly, but it carries so much meaning with it. This will be the first time she has contacted the brunette since her father's funeral. But, Clarke isn't whole without her and hopes that this kind gesture can open up the gates for them again. Christmas should be spent with who she loves and it hurts that she isn't there. 

She stares at the unsent message for several long minutes before sending. She closes her eyes and allows her fingers to tap on the 'send' button. 

**Sent to Lexa Woods:** _Merry Christmas._


	9. Chapter 9

She should be happy but she isn't. A fake smile is plastered on her face throughout the Christmas festivities, while deep down her heart is colder than the air outside. Why isn't she happy? Why can't she bring herself to be happy? It's Christmas. Even her Aunt Indra who is serious and never smiles is laughing and telling jokes to their family and friends. So why the fuck couldn't she be like her Aunt Indra and just allow herself to enjoy Christmas?

It's been two weeks since she watched Clarke's Snapchat story. After seeing the picture, every hope she had of the two getting back together was gone. She was right, sometimes people lose their soulmates. Except, it isn't okay. Nothing about this is okay. 

No one knows about it, though, not even Anya. As far as everyone else is concerned, the two are still on a break and Clarke hasn't appeared to move on at all. If she were to tell Anya all she would hear is how she may be overreacting. That Clarke and the boy could be just friends. But it wouldn't explain the twinkle in her eyes and the genuine smile on her face when she was in the photo with him. It doesn't explain the fact that she updated social media for the first time since the funeral with him.

She hasn't been on her phone since that day. She just listened to music on Anya's phone and watched television to occupy her. She couldn't risk opening another social media post from Clarke and seeing something that could hurt just as much. Something that could be confirming her assumptions of the blonde and the freckled boy. 

A part of her tells her that she's overthinking things. That Clarke would never be with someone else. They're soulmates after all. But, on the other hand, they did break up and Clarke didn't have a legitimate reason for it. Yeah, she wanted to protect Lexa and she knows this, but the break up just made things worse. 

She wasn't protecting Lexa. Lexa was hurting more and more as the days passed on. The hours grew longer and it felt as if time stood still. Every moment she didn't hear from Clarke was another moment of her heart growing colder. This photo was what broke her. 

Lexa fell into the darkness and she doesn't know how she will escape without Clarke by her side. Her heart is stone cold and she can't even bring herself to be joyful on the happiest day of the year. She loved Christmas, but she loved Clarke more, and without the blonde by her side, she couldn't bring herself to enjoy anything. 

After gifts were exchanged and wrapping paper littered the floor, Anya rose from her spot on the floor and approached Lexa. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" She whispered, nodding her head towards the guest bedroom. Lexa frowned and followed her friend into the empty room. Anya shut the door, "What's going on? Is this about Clarke?"

Lexa didn't respond. There was no use arguing against her and saying that it wasn't. She was too tired to pretend that everything was okay. She didn't want to tell her that her depressed state was because of the blonde either. She just wanted to be left alone on the subject, but there was no use. Her friend was practicing to be a lawyer, why did she think she could hide something from her? There have never been any secrets in their friendship and this wasn't going to be the first. 

"What happened? Did she contact you?"

She shook her head no. But really, there was a possibility that she could've. Lexa did turn off her phone for two weeks, but in reality, Clarke most likely didn't contact her. If she wanted to get back together she would've ended up appearing at Lexa's apartment, not relying on the phone to rekindle their love for each other. 

"Talk to me." Anya demanded, growing a bit impatient with the silent game her friend was playing. 

"There was a photo," Lexa sighed, trying hard to keep her voice calm and steady. "She posted it on Snapchat. It was of her and a boy. He was handsome and she just looked so happy with him..."

"Stop right there." Anya said. "I don't want to hear anymore because I haven't seen the photo and you could be overacting. You have every right too. I mean, you two did break up for no reason but at the same time, you didn't fight for her. On the other hand, you also have relationship issues because of Costia. Now, I know you said that you're over that and you talked to her for closure and everything, but I know you and I know that that incident still effects you negatively to this day." Anya took a deep breath and scanned Lexa's face for something else before continuing. "Go get your phone."

"Why?"

"Just go get your damn phone." 

The brunette complied to her roommate's demands and walked to her duffel bag and rummaged through it until she found her phone buried beneath all of her clothes. She unplugged Anya's phone from the charger and plugged hers into it, holding on to the power button, waiting for the small apple to appear on the screen. After some time her phone came to life. "Now what?" She asked, confused as to why she had to get her phone. 

"Text her." Anya instructed.

"No." 

"It's been almost two months. Text your damn soulmate. I'm sick of seeing you brooding around everyday and I also don't want you to think that she's hooking up with some guy. There could be plenty of reasons as to why she was happy with him in the photo. He could be a cousin or something, I mean it's Christmas, Lex."

"I don't even know what to say."

"Just wish her a Merry Christmas."

And Lexa did just that. She typed out the text and hit send. The moment she hit the send button, a text appeared on her screen saying the exact same message: 

 **Clarke Griffin:** _Merry Christmas._

 

 

-

 

Can you just imagine that? Not hearing from your soulmate in months and you both happen to send the same exact text at the same exact time. It was a Christmas miracle. 

It hit her like a ton of bricks. All of the feelings that were buried deep down came rushing back to the surface. Clarke couldn't breathe. It was all too much. Her eyes swelled with tears. Tears of joy and regret. She regretted ever leaving her. Ever burying this feeling. A feeling that she cared for oh so much. But right now, she had so much joy. The brunette was thinking of her. She was thinking of Clarke.

 _I miss you._ She types out without thinking and doesn't hesitate to hit the send button. A split second after she realized what she has sent, her heart stops and her eyes go wide. She's holding her breath and she doesn't even realize it, anticipating the response. 

The text bubble pops up with the three dots. It feels like they have been dancing on the screen for years. Centuries. It disappears. For a few seconds there is no response, Clarke is getting ready to break down. But then, the bubble pops back up and within a second a grey message appears on her screen. 

_**Lexa Woods:** I hope all is well. _

Her heart sank. She reads the text out loud, over and over again. There was no reciprocation. Lexa doesn't miss her. Clarke fucked up. She really, really, really fucked up. Tears threaten to escape, but Clarke pretends that the message isn't a big deal and sends another text.  _We should catch up sometime. Let's get coffee together, at that one café, you know the one._

 **Lexa Woods:** _I would like that. I'll be there at ten tomorrow._

Her lips curved up into a small smile, and a single tear fell down her cheek. Lexa was willing to meet with Clarke. This was the blonde's chance to make things right. This was her chance to apologize for being stupid and letting her go. Apologize for not contacting her in all this time, despite the hesitation to text her every single day. 

She put the phone back into her pocket and took a deep breath, her small smile never leaving her lips. She was going to see Lexa tomorrow. She was going to fix everything. 

Or, at least she hoped. 

 

-

 

It's ten o'clock and the blonde is sitting at the small table by the door. Her necklace cool against her skin. She feels just as she did a few months ago when the two first met. She was just as nervous and just as afraid. Every single time the small bell rang when the door opened, her head would shoot up, disappointed every time Lexa didn't walk in. 

Her necklace started to warm. Her heart beating faster. Clarke started to hyperventilate, forgetting how to breathe. The bell rang and there she was, almost as beautiful as when Clarke first saw her. 

Tears immediately began to swell in her eyes. Lexa turned to her and gave her a small smile. Clarke couldn't bear to stay seated and just stare at her, she jumped out of her seat and approached the brunette, engulfing her in a hug. She couldn't hold it back anymore. She broke down. 

"I'm so sorry," she mumbled into Lexa's shoulder. 

The brunette didn't reply. She just nodded her head and tightened her arms around Clarke. She kept her head high and didn't allow herself to cry. Didn't allow herself to show emotions to the girl who hurt her so badly. 

Clarke finally pulled back, wiping away her tears. She didn't even allow herself to think her next action through, her mouth immediately spilling out everything she's wanted to say for months. 

"Lexa, I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. And I know that sorry doesn't mean much considering that I probably broke your heart, but please, just hear me out. I thought I was going to ruin your life. After my dad died, I just felt like getting close to you was going to hurt too much. I was scared that I was going to turn you into this monster. This person who hates their life because they have to deal with a girl who just lost her father. I was scared that if I got too attached, too close, that something may happen to you. And I don't think I could handle losing you as well. 

"See, Lexa, the thing is, I love you. Yeah, I know, we haven't said it and it's probably 'too soon' or whatever. But, I love you. I'm in love with you. Hell, you're my damn soulmate. After I ended things at the funeral, I started to picture my life without you. Or at least, I tried. I wanted to see if my future could still be okay without my dad and you. God, I was wrong. I can't see my life without you, and I never want to try and picture that again. It just hurt too much. 

"Losing you was the most selfish and irresponsible thing I have ever done. I gave up the one person who I was meant to be with. Even if fate was wrong or these damn necklaces didn't exist, I would still want to be with you. I would still need to be with you. I'm not me without you, Lexa. You're my everything. Every single day since the funeral was unbearable. Losing my father was terrible, it hurt, it still hurts. But, the damage is only getting worse with every second I'm not with you. And I'm sorry, and I really hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. If not, I understand, but please, Lexa, give me another chance. I need you. I fucking need you."

Lexa was crying now, unable to stay strong anymore. She grabbed Clarke and pulled her in for a kiss, the salt from their tears tracing against the other's lips. They kissed, forgetting about the need to breathe. Forgetting about the environment they were in and the amount of people surrounding them. They forgot about everything. All that existed were the two of them. God, they missed this. 

Clarke pulled back first, blinking away her tears, staring at Lexa in hopes of a response. Wanting her to say something; anything. 

"I fucking love you." Lexa whispered, the tears coming faster. "I don't know where I would be without you, Clarke. You're the one. There is no one else I would rather spend my life with than you. I fucking love you."

Clarke embraced Lexa in another hug, holding her tight, scared that if she let go she would lose Lexa again. It was stupid, but after this last month of being without the brunette, the blonde wanted nothing more than to hold onto her for the rest of her life. She never wanted to let go. 

But, this was reality and eventually she pulled back after the tears stopped flooding out of her eyes, and smiled at the love of her life "Want to come back to my place?" She offered. It was innocent, she didn't hint at anything behind it. She just wanted to be in the company of Lexa and make up for all of their lost time. 

Lexa nodded her head and took Clarke's hand, allowing the younger girl to guide her out of the coffee shop and to her loft. The two ended up having to unlock their intertwined fingers because the snow started to pick up and the next thing they knew, they were running to the loft. 

Unlocking the door, the two shivered and brushed off all of the snow that fell atop of their clothes and hair. It was pretty loud inside, Clarke forgetting that Octavia and Bellamy were still home. She could've sworn O was out dropping him off at the train station. There goes her alone time to rekindle with Lexa. 

"Lexa!" Octavia yelled, jumping up from the couch to run over and hug the brunette, taking her by surprise. 

"Nice to see you too, Octavia..." Lexa was hesitant, stiffening up to the interaction. She didn't know Octavia that well and was a bit surprised that the girl was so eager to see her. 

"Sorry," Octavia pulled back and laughed, realizing that her relationship with Lexa wasn't like that, "I'm just happy to see you here with Clarke." She leaned in and whispered into her ear so no one else would hear, "This one has been a mess without you, I'm glad that you two are good again."

A small smile formed on her lips, her green eyes lighting up looking at the blonde, her heart swelling with love. "Trust me, Octavia, no one is more glad about this than me."

"I don't believe we've met," Octavia's brother said, approaching Lexa with an extended hand, "I'm Bellamy, Octavia's brother." 

Lexa was hesitant, looking the boy up and down, remembering the Snapchat photo that Clarke posted a week ago. Her eyes were serious and deadly, looking at him, her body filling with jealousy. She shook his hand sternly, giving him a small fake smile. 

Bellamy's eyebrows were brought together as a small confused frown plastered his face; what'd he do?

Clarke watched the interaction and noticed the tension between the two and chimed in, "Bellamy is basically my brother too. He lived with us, along with O, so I grew up with him. I haven't seen him in almost a year though since he moved to Florida, so it was nice of him to stop by for Christmas."

Lexa relaxed, her cheeks turning a bit pink. She felt stupid. Anya was right, he's just a friend and obviously nothing was or is going on between him and the blonde. She tried to mask the tension by laughing and then walked away from the boy, giving him a small smile, and went towards Clarke. Once by the blonde's side, she wrapped her arms around her and kissed her on the cheek, happy to be back with her. 

Clarke's eyes widened with surprise to the affection that she was showing. Lexa wasn't the type to condone PDA, but she figures that a lot has changed. Either way, she wasn't complaining. She missed the feeling of being wrapped in Lexa's arms. 

The two curled up together on the couch, staring at the Christmas tree that had to be taken down. "I'm sorry we didn't get to spend Christmas together." Clarke whispered to Lexa. 

"The tree is still up, maybe we can pretend that today is Christmas instead."

"But, I didn't get you a gift."

"I don't need one." Lexa said, kissing the top of her head, "You're the best gift there is."

"You two are so fucking cheesy, Jesus Christ, get a damn room!" Octavia yelled from the kitchen. 

"Hey! It's Jesus's birthday don't be rude!" Clarke yelled back, laughing. 

Octavia just shook her head and walked over to her brother, "C'mon Bell, let's leave these two alone." He nodded and complied, following his sister out of the loft, locking the door behind them. 

"I guess it's just us," Clarke smiled, looking up at her girlfriend. 

"Yeah, it's just us." Lexa replied. Never has it felt better to say those words. It's just the two of them. It didn't even matter that they were about to go into Clarke's room and have sex. It didn't matter that she was going to explore the blonde's body once again. All that mattered was that they were back together. The girl that she loved most in the world; the girl that she  _needed_ most in the world was right here with her. 

It may have been December 26th, but it definitely was a Merry Christmas, and it sure as hell would be a happy new year. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays, friends! Thank you for staying with me this whole time! I'm finished with finals so I will be updating more frequently again until class starts back up again. Thank you for being so patient with me and I hope you enjoyed!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that I have been gone for so long, but here it is, the final chapter.

3...2...1... Happy New Year!

The ball drops above their heads in Times Square. The deafening sound of thousands of people around them cheering. Ryan Seacrest bellowing in his microphone for everyone to have a happy new year. Clarke and Lexa don't hear anything though. Their hearts beat loud in their chest, their breathing slows down. The only thing that exists at this moment is the two of them, the warmth of their lips wrapped around the other's. Lexa holds Clarke in her arms, one hand on her lower back, the other cradling her neck.

2017\. This is their year. This is the year that will shape their future together. All of Lexa's plans with this girl flashes through her head in an instant. Her plans to find an apartment with her, their graduation, engagement. All of this was possible this year. The couple was stronger than ever. After their break, they realized that they can't be without the other. Fate was right. The two do belong together. 

Lexa pulled back and whispered to Clarke, the fog from her breath visible in the crisp, cold air, "Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year." Clarke whispered back, a huge, cheesy smile on her face. The two looked up towards the stage and danced together as Coldplay performed, beckoning in the new year. 

 

-

 

The repetitive shrieking that came from her alarm clock woke not only Clarke up, but Lexa as well. It was the first day back to classes, and Clarke cursed herself for making the same mistake and choosing morning classes. 

"Why did we pick morning classes, again?" Clarke groaned to Lexa, almost inaudible, her head buried in the pillow. 

"Something about so we have more time to come home and spend time together." Lexa responded, rubbing her eyes and yawning. 

Clarke turned to look at the brunette, her face was clear of makeup and a small amount of crust rested on her eyelids. But, she was still breathtakingly beautiful. Clarke would never get used to this. She didn't want to get used to it. "Come home, yeah, that'll be nice if we actually lived together."

Lexa giggled as a loud Octavia was heard tripping over something in the living room. Perfect timing. "We should live together then, fix that problem."

"Wait, how? I can't kick Octavia out..."

"Doesn't Lincoln have his own apartment?"

That's right. Lincoln does live on his own and he's been trying to get Octavia to move in but she's been somewhat reluctant every time. Why was that though? Clarke needed to find out, and she didn't see any harm in bringing up the idea to her best friend.

She shot out of bed, threw on some sweatpants and walked out the door quickly, leaving Lexa alone in bed. The brunette didn't mine though, she loved to watch Clarke leave, especially since she was wearing Lexa's sweatpants that were a bit snug on her.

"Octavia!" Clarke greeted her friend, Lexa listening from the other room. 

"Clarke!" Octavia greeted back, not bothering to acknowledge the fact that there was someone else in the apartment, as well. Lexa has been spending the night frequently over the break, rarely spending time at her own apartment. Octavia didn't mind, Clarke was happy and it gave her an excuse to stay over at Lincoln's.

"I have a question for you," Clarke started, getting straight to the point, "why haven't you ever moved in with Lincoln? He had his own apartment and you two are soulmates and everything."

Octavia laughed, "Are you trying to get me to move out?"

"What?! No! Of course not! I love you, it's just that-" 

"Dude, chill, I'm just messing with you. But, I don't know, you and I are best friends and we came to college together and have been roommates for years. I just didn't want to leave you alone just because I found Lincoln, and like I felt like, you know, this was our thing - the college experience and everything, like in movies and shit."

"Aw, O," Clarke smiled and walked closer to embrace her in a hug, "you are my best friend and I love living with you, but I won't be alone if you leave, I have Lexa."

"It's true," Lexa said, emerging from the room, leaning against the door frame, "I'm pretty good company and Anya would love it if I moved out. She would finally have the apartment to herself and wouldn't have to deal with me nagging her all the time."

"I'm pretty sure Clarke would love it if I left too, she's sick of me waking her up all the time," Octavia joked, "Except, if it wasn't for me, you would've flunked out already."

"Don't worry, I'll keep her from flunking out. Besides, we just have one more semester to go and we're both done, so she just has to make it sixteen more weeks."

Clarke rolled her eyes at all the talk about school and brought the two back on topic, "So, O, what do you say?"

Octavia looked at the both of them and then around the loft before a toothy smile appeared on her face, "I have to make a phone call." She retrieved her phone from her pocket and proceeded out the door to call Lincoln. 

The couple looked at each other with big smiles on their faces, "I guess you're moving in!" Clarke squealed, rushing over to hug her girlfriend. 

"I guess I am! Alright, I have to head back to my apartment and tell Anya I'm moving out. I'll text you when it's okay to come over and help me pack." 

 

-

 

"It's about time." Anya responded to the news, a dead expression on her face, as if she could care less. Lexa was perplexed by this reaction, she knew Anya wouldn't mind her leaving, but she thought that she would be a least a little bit sympathetic towards the situation. "I love you and everything Lex, but you not being home these past couple weeks have been really nice. I've gotten a ton of sleep and a lot of studying done."

She was baffled, her mouth hung open, unsure of what to say. She struggled to string together a sentence, taken back by her best friend's response. She had this whole speech planned out about how much she loved Anya and how she was only doing this to be with her soulmate and that she should be happy for her since she's over Costia and finally putting love first, etc. But nope. Anya didn't even hint at putting up a struggle about her leaving. Great, now Lexa has nothing to say. Of course, she was grateful that her friend was happy for her and wasn't sad about her leaving, but she was kind of hurt. After all the duo have been through together and this is what she gets. 

"Wow, okay. That was a lot easier than I thought." Lexa finally managed to reply, a hint of sarcasm and annoyance in her voice. 

Anya noticed the slight attitude directed towards her and caught on to the brunette's feelings quickly. She knew her all too well and knew that she was a bit butt hurt about Anya's lack of emotion. She laughed at this, causing Lexa to turn a bit read with frustration. She saw her hand tighten into a fist and her jaw clench, obviously holding herself back from saying something rude to the best friend. Once her laughter subsided, she snarked at the girl, "I can't believe you seriously think that I'm not upset about this." She laughed again, "Dude, you know I'm going to miss you, relax."

Lexa relaxed and let out a sigh, shaking her head and smiling. "Yeah, I know." She lied, a tint of red coloring her cheeks, embarrassed.

Anya walked over to her friend and embraced her in a tight hug, "I love you, man." She mumbled into her shoulder, "And I am so unbelievably happy for you, you have no idea." She pulled back and put both hands on her shoulders, looking her in the eye, "You're welcome to stop by anytime, so hold on to your key. You never know when you might have to drop by." She winked at her, knowing damn well that Lexa would still be over there.

"Thanks, An." Lexa smiled and nodded. She then retreated into her room to pack up her things, this was the start of something new. She was now one step closer to her forever with Clarke.

 

-

\- Four months later -

-

 

Graduation. The two have been waiting for this moment since they started college. The two got ready together, music blasting through the apartment. Lexa was the most excited though, she has been waiting for this day since she got closure with Costia. Even when the duo separated during the holidays after Clarke's dad died. She still looked forward to today, and still held onto it. She gripped the small box and placed it into her pocket underneath her gown. 

The ceremony dragged on for what felt like a lifetime, all to get a blank sheet of paper that mimicked a diploma. The two met up with each other afterwards, forced to sit apart due to being from different colleges within the university. Outside they were met with leis and flowers from their family and friends. There was so much going on, other families celebrating around them and each friend trying to get a word in first.

Everything was moving so fast for everyone but Lexa. Time slowed as she turned to Clarke and got down on one knee. She pulled out a box and inside was a ring with a star shaped diamond.

"Clarke Griffin, my soulmate, our necklaces formed a star when connected and we went on to wonder what it meant. Traditionally, we would wait until the wedding to have it read, but I couldn't help but contact an old friend and have him translate for us instead. I just needed to know. But, it all made sense afterwards. Star-crossed lovers. No matter what situation we may face, time may be taken away from one another, but time will always bring us back to each other. I am ready to spend the rest of my life with you, and deal with all of the problems the universe tries to throw at us. I love you, Clarke, would you do me the honor of marrying me?"

Tears fell down her cheeks, and she was all too emotional to say a word, so she just nodded. She nodded and smiled and embraced Lexa and held onto her as tightly as she could. They hugged one another for so long and so tight, as if one would be taken away if the other were to let go.

Their love was like a wildfire. It could not be tamed nor controlled. No matter what happens, the two will just continue to grow together. Forever.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who stuck around and waited for the very end. I appreciate each and every one of you for your comments and kudos which encouraged me to continue this story. I apologize that the ending seems rushed, but I made the decision to stop writing Clexa fan fiction at the beginning of the year, but I figured I couldn't just abandon the fic. This is my most proud piece, and I would just like to say thank you again.


End file.
